WEEK 7 THOUGHTS, PICKS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 09 October 2026 21:16

Published: Friday, 09 October 2026 21:16

Written by Topper

Hits: 105

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, there are only 2 weeks left in the TSL Fall 2026 season. That means the teams better be rounding into form soon, or else they’re going to have a very short Race For Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality that doesn’t end in being immortal. As I’ve mentioned in this article about 40,000 times over the last few decades, it isn’t how you start the season that matters, it’s how you finish it. 

Now that we’ve had a pretty good sample size of games across the league, here are the hottest and coldest teams in the league currently over the last 3 weeks or so: 

WHO’S HOT

Those 5 teams shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that’s really been watching the league. The Raw Milkers rocketed to the top of the D6 standings and knocked both Select and the Irish Giants off their perch. The Coochie Monsters have been rolling through anyone they’ve played lately. BQI has been otherworldly since a slow start in D2, but the same can be said for Let’s Get Reccked who have gone 3-0 since an 0-3 start. TMA hasn’t stopped rolling either. 

HONORABLE MENTION

These teams didn’t make the super kool graphic, however they’ve also been playing quite well, heating up at the right time:

The Malones - Yeah, they’re ‘back’ and now QB Strug has returned? Nobody is going to want to play them come playoffs. Or even now. 

PowerPuff Girls - They’re winning, they’ve got some mojo back, they have Kayla Voss showing everyone why she gets taken 3 rounds ahead of Nick in fantasy drafts, and they’re getting back to being VERY dangerous. 

Wet Bandits - Yes, those D5 Wet Bandits, not the Legends in disguise. They’re 2-2 over the last 3 weeks, sure, but the two losses? A 3 point loss to Pit Harade and a 2 point loss to Blitzkrieg. They’re two plays away from being 4-0 in those games, being 5-2 overall, and being the hottest team in the league. That deserves to be mentioned. 

WHO’S COLD AS ICE

These teams were the cat’s ass in the first part of the season but have since gone through it big time. Except for Balls Deep. They’re a rollercoaster this season, losing two games before winning two against PPG and the Coochie Monsters, and then getting destroyed by both Skeleton Crew and Flying Balls. Not great. Each team left on this list has some sort of excuse to be here: Frodo has Garrett’s injury, Bullet Club has injuries to multiple females, Freeballers have to combat Buddy, and I’m sure Bengay has some issue I don’t know about. There’s still time for them to snap out of it, there’s just less of it. 

D1

Sticky Bandits stayed atop the division and made a statement doing it, hanging 65 on a Frodo Swaggins team that’s in disarray. Eyes Downtown reminded Can’t Touch This who runs D1, ending their hot streak with a 59‑35 rout. The Malones kept the resurrection going, dropping 54 on the Freeballers. 

EYES DOWNTOWN VS FREEBALLERS (+11) - Well, if there’s going to be a “Freeballers arrival” moment, it would have to be this game against the defending champs. The problem is that based on how both teams are playing, it seems incredibly unlikely. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 16

STICKY BANDITS VS LEGENDS (+8) - A battle of two of the best teams in the division. This one has a little bit more at stake, as the winner of this game will be the only 1 loss team remaining in D1, which means they control their own destiny in terms of winning the division and getting the first round bye. That’s going to matter more than in years past because realistically getting to play the “7th seed” in the 2v7 message will be a lot harder than it has been. Expect both teams’ best here. LEGENDS BY 1

CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+12) - Can’t Touch This hit a bump in the road last week in the form of Eyes Downtown, but that’s nothing to be ashamed of. They’ll get their confidence right against Frodo, who has been all over the place. I don’t know if Garrett is going to play yet, as that would obviously matter a bit, but assuming not for this one. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 18

STICKY BANDITS VS FREEBALLERS (+13) - Sticky gets the Freeballers on the back half of a double header for both. Freeballers will be continuing to be looking to prove something against a top team, Sticky needs to keep notching wins in the race for the #1 seed. STICKY BANDITS BY 13

LEGENDS VS THE MALONES (+9) - Well, this game should be quiet and professional where both teams will just have fun. The Malones getting the Legends just as they’re starting to peak this season is top notch entertainment. THE MALONES BY 1

EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+13) - This game was rescheduled from a few weeks ago, and Eyes Downtown may end up regretting that, as The Malones found whatever their version of Popeye’s spinach or Mario’s Starman is. Although BQI plays at the same time as this one, and BQI is basically just Eyes Downtown with Bridget throwing. I can’t imagine Bobby would want to play this at anything less than full strength though. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 7

D2

The division officially has flipped on its head. BQI put a 52‑8 beating on Bullet Club to take the division lead, and Let’s Get Reccked kept its  turnaround rolling with an easy win over PWI. The System’s misery continued, falling to DXYZ to drop to 1‑6 and having Andrew walk around with an angry, scrunched face. 

BQI VS PWI (+5) - The easiest part of this game is typing it out. 6 letters total. Great work. At the end of the day, this game simply comes down to how many Eyes Downtowners are allowed to play in D2 when the parent club has a game. It doesn’t feel likely that many of them will. PWI BY 12

BULLET CLUB VS PWI (+2) - Both teams could really use a shot in the arm to get going, and last time these teams played it came down to the last play. I expect more of the same in this one. PWI BY 1

LET’S GET RECCKED VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+2) - There have been songs that have been sung about how well LGR has been playing as of late, but DXYZ haven’t been slouches either. This game will be closer than you’re thinking it will be. D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 3

D3

Grey Hair - Don’t Care is 7‑0, handling Mike’s Detailing to stay perfect. Cunning Stunts kept pace at 5‑1 behind another big offensive day against Practice Squad. And Cobblestone, well, Cobblestone forfeited again to Buffalo Vice, the second time this season they’ve resolved a scheduling problem by not showing up. 

BUFFALO VICE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+2) - Both teams have their fair share of issues, Practice Squad just can’t seem to click how they want to, and Buffalo Vice simply doesn’t really get to play enough games to work out the kinks as half of their games this season have been forfeits. The last time these teams met though was a 1 point thriller, and I think we’ll see that again. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 1

 GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+10) - ITS ON. Here’s your super awesome game of the day. Grey Hair has its perfect season on the line this week against the Stunts, who’ve arguably been the hotter team since these two met in Week 1. The Stunts have averaged just a hair under 50 points a game since that battle, absolutely demolishing the competition. They’ll be looking to get that win back for sure. CUNNING STUNTS BY 4

D4

On today’s edition of the soap opera that is D4: The Blue Ballers found their offense again and dropped 40 on Not So Sticky, ending their perfect season. Flying Balls kept quietly stacking wins, edging the Tater Thots by a point. I’d Rather Be Golfing drew a brutal doubleheader and got outscored by a combined 52 points to the Thots and Coochies. PowerPuff Girls handled Two Tuddies.

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BALLS DEEP (+15) - Will the real Balls Deep please stand up? If the pattern holds true, Balls Deep will pull this one out. The Thots have been pretty good most of the year though, and I can’t imagine that a week off fixed the Balls Deep offense. GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 12

SKELETON CREW VS TWO TUDDIES (+10) - Two teams in the murky middle of D4 meet in this one. Even if the Tud Buds are the only “Non-Cobblestone” team to not win a game yet in the league, it’s not for a lack of trying. They DO have a tie after all. Things may not have gone their way, but the Tuddies probably remain optimistic, and they know they have a good team. They didn’t actually just forget how football works a few weeks ago, right? Of course not. They catch a good but not great Skeleton Crew at the right time, which is perfect for them. Put ‘em on the board. TWO TUDDIES BY 8

NOT SO STICKY VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+2) - A battle for first place in the division (sort of, if the Flying Balls win they’ll potentially be in first) but these two teams have been good all season and we’ve got a doozy on our hands this time around. Not So Sticky had their slip up last week, it’s the Coochies’ turn. NOT SO STICKY BY 3

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS BLUE BALLERS (+1) - The Blue Ballers found their offense again, just in time to play an improving Powerpuff Girls team. This is another great game, the schedule makers really nailed this week. The Blue Ballers are unstoppable when firing on all cylinders. BLUE BALLERS BY 7

FLYING BALLS VS I’D RATHER BE GOLFING (+13) - Golfing is probably running to the Golf Course as they finish up their season a week early. It’s incredible to think that Eickhoff could have an 8-0 team in D3, but end up 9-7 on the season. Flying Balls just keep on keepin’ on at this point as they continue to rack up wins. FLYING BALLS BY 9

D5

TMA went 2‑0, knocking off CFB before a 30‑6 dismantling of Pit Harade to surge all the way to the top of D5. Victorious Secret won an instant classic over Blitzkrieg, 44‑43, completing a hell of a comeback. And Wet Bandits edged the 716ers by a single point in another great D5 game. 

And somehow, there are no D5 games this week. 

D6

Raw Milkers and Irish Giants played a game that ended 15‑0, and the Milkers walked away as the last perfect team standing in the division. Cat‑Tastrophe beat SBG by 19 in a bit of a surprise, Select handled Blitzed and Confused, and Sticky Laces got a comfortable win over Bengay Bandits

SELECT VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+16) - D6 has a lot of games that are just going to look lopsided. This is the first one. SELECT BY 20

STICKY LACES VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) - This is the second one, but Sticky Laces aren’t exactly world beaters, and this game will be closer than you’d think. STICKY LACES BY 6

IRISH GIANTS VS SBG (+15) - SBG keeps this one close, but not close enough. IRISH GIANTS BY 12

RAW MILKERS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+18) - Raw Milkers get to breathe a sigh of relief after getting a killer slate of games the last few weeks. RAW MILKERS BY 18

RAW MILKERS VS BENGAY BANDITS (+14) - The first of two REALLY tough games for the Bengay Bandits. RAW MILKERS BY 17

IRISH GIANTS VS BENGAY BANDITS (+14) - It doesn’t get any easier for them here. IRISH GIANTS BY 21

TSC vs THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK’S RESULTS (Week 6):
The Godfather: 18‑5 SU, 16‑5‑2 ATS
The TSC: 17‑6 SU, 13‑8‑2 ATS

SEASON:
The Godfather: 86‑41‑3 SU, 70‑55‑5 ATS
The TSC: 74‑53‑3 SU, 57‑68‑5 ATS

THE TSC’S PICKS:

D1
EYES DOWNTOWN VS FREEBALLERS (+11) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 8
STICKY BANDITS VS LEGENDS (+8) -- STICKY BANDITS BY 5
CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+12) -- CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 14
STICKY BANDITS VS FREEBALLERS (+13) -- STICKY BANDITS BY 15
LEGENDS VS THE MALONES (+9) -- LEGENDS BY 6
EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+13) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 15

D2
BQI VS PWI (+5) -- PWI BY 2
BULLET CLUB VS PWI (+2) -- PWI BY 2
LET’S GET RECCKED VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+2) -- D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 2

D3
BUFFALO VICE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+2) -- PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2
GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE VS CUNNING STUNTS (+10) -- GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 7

D4
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BALLS DEEP (+15) -- GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 17
SKELETON CREW VS TWO TUDDIES (+10) -- SKELETON CREW BY 7
NOT SO STICKY VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+2) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 2
POWERPUFF GIRLS VS BLUE BALLERS (+1) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 1
FLYING BALLS VS I’D RATHER BE GOLFING (+13) -- FLYING BALLS BY 15

D6
SELECT VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+16) -- SELECT BY 18
STICKY LACES VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) -- STICKY LACES BY 17
IRISH GIANTS VS SBG (+15) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 17
RAW MILKERS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+18) -- RAW MILKERS BY 20
RAW MILKERS VS BENGAY BANDITS (+14) -- RAW MILKERS BY 16
IRISH GIANTS VS BENGAY BANDITS (+14) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 16

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY 

-When was the last time we had an entire division just off for a week? D5 is apparently just not playing this week. 

-D1 is absolutely insane this week as Legends, Eyes Downtown, The Malones, Sticky Bandits, and Freeballers all are a part of this rotating doubleheader pentagram of doom that will really show us where everyone currently stands. There’s a lot of good football incoming. Shout out to Can’t Touch This and Frodo, who can just play each other and then watch everyone else beat the crap out of each other. 

-D6’s slate is essentially the opposite, with the top teams (with special guest Sticky Laces!) all get to beat up on the bottom half of the division. 

-Marquee matchups still exist across all of the divisions - Bullet Club vs PWI, Grey Hair vs the Stunts, Not So Sticky vs Coochie Monsters. What a slate of games this week. 

-And how many of them will be ruined by Fall Fest? Ellicottville's Fall Fest is traditionally a “light” week for players showing up to their games (probably why D5 doesn’t play at all), and has caused the most missed games in TSL history (just ahead of Labor Day and COVID). Of course you’d want to miss the best football you could play so you can stand 7 deep at the bar in Balloons waiting 47 minutes for a High Noon while multiple 20-23 year olds puke outside. But hey, the leaves look pretty. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

-The TSL season is going to have a hell of a last two weeks, as some big games, playoff seeding, and bye weeks are going to be determined with players not only missing this week for Fall Fest, but allegedly there’s a decent contingent of TSLers going to Las Vegas the next week for the Bills game? Anything can happen. 

-Breakfast Club Predictions: 

D’s Nutz 40, Steph Infection 17

Carly-fornia Dreaming 33, Meagan It Happen 20

Megoonsta’s 27, Missydemeanor 14

-I didn’t realize we only were getting half of a TSL podcast this week. (EDITOR’S NOTE: THIS HAS BEEN FIXED.)

-At least we had Tino’s beautiful poetry this week. If you didn’t see it, click here to read it: https://tsl716.com/index.php/the-lenny-alba-variety-hour

-You know every single division has multiple teams that can win the title, and there are once again no truly “overpowered” teams anywhere, right? 

-Games of the Day: 

10:00 - Legends vs Sticky Bandits

11:00 - Balls Deep vs Great Value Tater Thots

12:00 - Legends vs The Malones

1:00 - Eyes Downtown vs The Malones

2:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Grey Hair Don’t Care

3:00 - Coochie Monsters vs Not So Sticky

-I got more than a few messages and emails about referees making bad calls and apparently costing people “their season” (which is simply not true), so I just wanted to say this: If a ref makes a bad call, screaming at them is never going to make things better. On the other side of that, if you’re going to referee, you are required to at least know the rules. Or most of them. You can tell the playoffs are inching closer by the second. People are starting to crack. 

-I got bored and decided to look up the teams I’m doing the best at picking their games with. Here’s what I have: 

Straight Up — Most Right

1. Grey Hair – Don’t Care — 6-0 (+6)
2. Cunning Stunts — 6-0 (+6)
3. Freeballers — 5-0 (+5)
4. BQI — 6-1 (+5)
5. I’d Rather Be Golfing — 6-1 (+5)

Straight Up — Most Wrong

1. Bengay Bandits — 1-4 (−3)
2. Blitzkrieg — 2-5 (−3)
3. Balls Deep — 2-4 (−2)
4. Come From Behind — 2-4 (−2)
5. Cat-Tastrophe — 2-4 (−2)

ATS — Most Right

1. Cunning Stunts — 5-0 (+5)
2. Legends — 4-0 (+4)
3. Freeballers — 5-1 (+4)
4. Great Value Tater Thots — 5-1 (+4)
5. PWI — 4-1 (+3)

ATS — Most Wrong

1. Blue Ballers — 1-5 (−4)
2. Bengay Bandits — 1-4 (−3)
3. Blitzkrieg — 2-5 (−3)
4. Balls Deep — 2-4 (−2)
5. Not So Sticky — 2-4 (−2)

-Two middle of the standings teams that really will have a chance to take home their division titles as of right now are Let’s Get Reccked and the Blue Ballers. Bet on them while you still can get good odds. 

-You guys can’t keep getting away with this, but it’s looking like a beautiful, 70 degree day for you in Buffalo this weekend. Enjoy it while you still can. 

-GF OUT

WEEK 5 THOUGHTS, PICKS, AND STUFF!

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 25 September 2026 18:47

Published: Friday, 25 September 2026 18:47

Written by Topper

Hits: 204

Half of the TSL Fall 2026 season is officially over. It saddens me to say that, as we only have 4 more weeks of regular season TSL football before the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality begins on October 24th. At this point in the season, teams are really starting to show you who they are. 

This is the week where teams have to take a good look in the mirror and decide if what they’ve been doing is good enough to get them the championship they covet. For some teams, things are looking pretty good. Maybe they have to clean up something small here or there, but for the most part they’re locked in and ready to rock. There are other teams that already know that they have some work to do. These teams tend to be newer squads who are still figuring the ins and outs of how their team works, how the league works, or even (for some) how football works. They’ll continue to have fun and improve, with the hopes of being a tough out for someone in the playoffs as their best case scenario. They’re excited for the spring already. 

And then, there’s the rest of you. 

The ones whose records reflect the opposite of what they expected coming into the season. The ones where things aren’t clicking properly, for whatever reason. These are the teams that need to have that period of reflection to figure out what isn’t working, and what can they do to fix it. Sometimes that means making a few tweaks, other times that means having a tough conversation with someone on the team that just isn’t cutting it in their current role and they may need to be “repurposed”. You know the ones. Others in this group are too positive, and their group chat is full of texts like “We’re better than our record shows!”, “Don’t forget we were missing Billy and Betty that week we lost by 40!”, “Yeah, but we had to have a girl throw for us in D1!”, “Mercury was/wasn’t in retrograde then, we’ll be better from here on out!”. The teams that might stay too positive to acknowledge that anything is wrong until it's much too late for them. There’s nothing wrong with staying positive and hoping the results change, but for some of you who had championship aspirations coming into the season, doing that is basically the TSL’s version of “Thoughts and Prayers”. You’re not really doing anything, so don’t be a bunch of shocked Pikachus when the results stay the same. 

So, who are the league’s most surprising teams so far, good and bad? I used math to figure things out, and these were the results that came up: 

I’d say the math isn’t perfect as I wouldn’t consider the Irish Giants a surprise, but Pit Harade was supposed to be near the bottom of D5 and they’ve been one of the top teams all season. Bullet Club being at the top of D2 may not be a surprise, but being undefeated so far and winning how they have been is. The Cunning Stunts are slightly a surprise based on how badly they’ve been beating teams again. They look “back”. Not that they ever truly left. As for the Super Not So Good Teams? The System went in as D2 favorites and have played like the complete opposite. It’s almost as if they need a new system. 

…..

Sorry. 

As for the others, Cobblestone isn’t a surprise per se, but they were expected to do things like “play better” and “have a roster”. 716ers were looking to capitalize on their very good season last year, but haven’t just yet. They’ve also played the 2nd hardest schedule so far in D5, which isn’t helping matters. Freeballers continue to not meet expectations on the field, which is ironically called “Freeballering” around these parts. Mike’s Detailing is on here in 5th, which feels wrong but I’m not going to argue math at this point. Do better. They will. Right? 

It’s time for the best part of the halfway point article: Updated Championship Odds! 

Let’s get into it. 

D1

It’s not a surprise that the Sticky Bandits are the current favorites, given the Legends’ slow start, Eyes Downtown going through some internal stuff, and The Malones getting yeeted out of Fall 2026 title contention. 

The only D1 game played was the Legends reminding everyone they exist, hanging 47 on Eyes Downtown to climb to 3‑1. 

FREEBALLERS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+4) - A hell of a match to get us started off on the back half of the schedule here. Both teams should be rested and we’re going to be in for a good one. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 7

STICKY BANDITS VS THE MALONES (+18) - Sticky Bandits get the husk of The Malones this week in the first half of a double header. At least they’re easing into it. STICKY BANDITS BY 9

STICKY BANDITS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+9) - More of a prove it type game for Can’t Touch This, and you know they’ve been looking for a big win to really propel them moving forward. They’ll cover the spread, but Sticky is firing on all cylinders right now. STICKY BANDITS BY 3

FRODO SWAGGINS VS THE MALONES (+14) - Frodo Swaggins is having a lovely go at it in D1 so far, and they should be able to handle The Malones pretty easily here. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 17

EYES DOWNTOWN VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+1) - No word (to me anyway) on who is throwing for Eyes Downtown this week, but even if it isn’t Bobby, Eyes Downtown has too much talent to keep losing. Frodo will give them a battle. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

D2

D2 is really shaping up to be a 3 team race for the title right now, and the odds reflect that. Do not be surprised if any of the other teams catch up to the current leaders by season’s end. 

The System drew the short straw with a Saturday doubleheader and got worked over twice, going 0-2 on the day as  BQI dropped 45 on them and finally awake Let's Get Reccked took the nightcap 30‑13 for their first W. 

BULLET CLUB VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+16) - LGR is starting to get it together, and they know their season can absolutely be turned around with handing Bullet Club their first loss. With how well BC has been playing though, that’s going to be a tall task. BULLET CLUB BY 2

PWI VS THE SYSTEM (+11) - The System is in pieces, but a win over PWI can set them right. PWI hasn’t played in two weeks, so this will become a battle of who wants it more. And right now I think The System does. THE SYSTEM BY 2

BQI VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+13) - BQI looks to keep pace in the division as they’re rounding into form for the playoffs, working out any kinks they may have. The Kellers have had a rough go of things at times, but they should be able to keep pace here. BQI BY 4

D3

While D3 feels like it’s still Grey Hair’s to lose, the Stunts have been rolling and that can only mean that everyone else should watch out. You can’t sleep on the Squad or Mike’s, and Vice/Cobblestone bring up the rear. 

Grey Hair - Don't Care still doesn't care and still doesn't lose as they dispatched Buffalo Vice 47‑16 to move to 4‑0. The Stunts and Mike's Detailing turned in a 54‑38 track meet, with the Stunts coming out on top. Practice Squad handled a winless Cobblestone to stay in the mix. 

CUNNING STUNTS VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) - A rivalry renewed to some degree. These two teams used to duke it out in D4 for quite some time. However for right now, these are two teams headed in different directions. CUNNING STUNTS BY 10

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+16) - If Grey Hair thinks they’re just going to waltz into this matchup and win, they have another thing coming. Even if the Squad is misfiring a little bit this season, you know that B is taking all of the “Grey Hair Is Easily Winning D3” chatter to heart, and he’s going to play like he has something to prove. It might not matter. GREY HAIR DON’T CARE BY 3

PRACTICE SQUAD VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+2) - Practice Squad gets a two banger this week, and I can’t imagine they’ll lose two games this week. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 8

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS COBBLESTONE (+18) - This could be bad. GREY HAIR DON’T CARE BY 20

D4

NSS and the Thots have been the class of the division so far, but this is the division where you could bet on a long shot like Blue Ballers at 14-1 or the PowerPuff Girls at 20-1 and feel very good about this bet. 

D4 is the best kind of crazy. Not So Sticky survived Skeleton Crew by a single point to stay perfect at 4‑0, and the Tater Thots outlasted Blue Ballers 38‑36 to hang right there with them. Skeleton Crew split a doubleheader with a  40‑12 demolition of Balls Deep. Poor Two Tuddies played twice and still can't find a win, settling for a 21‑21 tie and then dropping a 36‑33 thriller to a Golfing squad that finally got on the board.

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+1) - Big time battle in D4. The Monsters are looking up at the Thots in the standings, but I don’t think it’ll be for long. Game of the day potential here. COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 8

FLYING BALLS VS BALLS DEEP (+6) - So many Balls. The Flying Balls continue to figure things out as the season goes on, and the defending champion have this “hot” and “cold” thing to them where sometimes they look like champions and other times they look like they’re happy we don’t officially have relegation. This is a hot week. I can feel it. BALLS DEEP BY 6

BLUE BALLERS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+11) - Golfing got the win last week against whatever the Tuddies have become, and just in time too, because the Blue Ballers are waiting. They haven’t been at full power for most of the season and they’re still dangerous. Uh oh. BLUE BALLERS BY 15

SKELETON CREW VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+6) - So. Much Tie. Dye. The Crew has been playing well recently, at least a little better than the PPGs seemed to have been. SKELETON CREW BY 1

NOT SO STICKY VS TWO TUDDIES (+12) - It must be retro rivalry week here in the TSL as we have another battle of old rivals this week. This one also has two teams going in opposite directions, with one on top of the division and the other one bringing up the rear. NOT SO STICKY BY 9

D5

D5 is looking like it has a little line of separation between the higher tier of VS, TMA, PH, and Blitzkrieg with the others a little behind. Don’t sleep on CFB for coming up from behind here. 

Come From Behind lived up to the name and torched Blitzkrieg for 40. TMA keeps stacking quiet wins and now owns the division's best scoring defense at 3‑2, while Pit Harade ground out a 17‑14 nailbiter against the Wet Bandits to sit 3‑1. The 716ers went 0-1-1, losing to TMA at noon, then clawing back to an 18‑18 tie with Room 40.

BLITZKRIEG VS WET BANDITS (+14) - Blitzkrieg can get back to their winning ways this week as they take on the Wet Bandits who have struggled this season to say the least. BLITZKRIEG BY 18

BLITZKRIEG VS PIT HARADE (+5) - These two teams both have title aspirations, and we could be staring at another Game of the Day candidate here. Getting the win here could be huge for future tiebreaker scenarios too. Pit Harade has been playing better as of late. PIT HARADE BY 8

COME FROM BEHIND VS 716ERS (+11) - CFB is looking to be over what ailed them earlier this season, and they look ready to take off in the second half of the season, while the 716ers just seem stuck in the mud. COME FROM BEHIND BY 7

ROOM 40 VS WET BANDITS (+9) - Room 40 continues to make strides this season as they improve every week. The Wet Bandits aren’t too far behind them though. D5 could be the hardest division to predict in a month or so. WET BANDITS BY 1

D6

We’ve got ourselves a 3 horse race as the Irish Giants, Raw Milkers, and Select all look to be battling it out for the crown. 

Raw Milkers stayed perfect at 3‑0 by holding off Select. The Irish Giants dropped 55 on Blitzed and Confused, a BAC team that had actually won earlier in the day over Cat‑Tastrophe. SBG continues their winning ways over the Bengay Bandits as well. 

SELECT VS SBG (+11) - If SBG is going to take themselves seriously as a championship contender, they’ll have to win this one, or at the very least, keep it very close to show they can hang with the big dogs in D6 and it’s more than just a 3 team division. SELECT BY 10

IRISH GIANTS VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+19) - If the Trophes are going to take themselves seriously as a championship contender, they’ll have to win this one, or at the very least, keep it very close to show they can hang with the big dogs in D6 and it’s more than just a 3 team division. IRISH GIANTS BY 25

RAW MILKERS VS STICKY LACES (+11) - If Sticky Laces are going to take themselves seriously as a championship contender, they’ll have to win this one, or at the very least, keep it very close to show they can hang with the big dogs in D6 and it’s more than just a 3 team division. RAW MILKERS BY 6

TSC VS THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS (Week 4):
The Godfather: 10‑8‑2 SU, 9‑11 ATS
The TSC: 9‑9‑2 SU, 9‑11 ATS

SEASON:
The Godfather: 53‑27‑3 SU, 47‑35‑1 ATS
The TSC: 41‑39‑3 SU, 36‑46‑1 ATS

THE TSC'S PICKS:

D1
FREEBALLERS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+4) -- CAN'T TOUCH THIS BY 2
STICKY BANDITS VS THE MALONES (+18) -- STICKY BANDITS BY 20
STICKY BANDITS VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+9) -- STICKY BANDITS BY 6
FRODO SWAGGINS VS THE MALONES (+14) -- FRODO SWAGGINS BY 16
EYES DOWNTOWN VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+1) -- FRODO SWAGGINS BY 3

D2
BULLET CLUB VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+16) -- BULLET CLUB BY 18
PWI VS THE SYSTEM (+11) -- PWI BY 8
BQI VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+13) -- BQI BY 15

D3
CUNNING STUNTS VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) -- CUNNING STUNTS BY 16
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+16) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 18
PRACTICE SQUAD VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+2) -- MIKE'S DETAILING BY 2
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS COBBLESTONE (+18) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 20

D4
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS COOCHIE MONSTERS (+1) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 1
FLYING BALLS VS BALLS DEEP (+6) -- BALLS DEEP BY 3
BLUE BALLERS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+11) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 8
SKELETON CREW VS POWERPUFF GIRLS (+6) -- POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 2
NOT SO STICKY VS TWO TUDDIES (+12) -- NOT SO STICKY BY 14

D5
BLITZKRIEG VS WET BANDITS (+14) -- BLITZKRIEG BY 16
BLITZKRIEG VS PIT HARADE (+5) -- PIT HARADE BY 3
COME FROM BEHIND VS 716ERS (+11) -- COME FROM BEHIND BY 7
ROOM 40 VS WET BANDITS (+9) -- ROOM 40 BY 5

D6
SELECT VS SBG (+11) -- SELECT BY 8
IRISH GIANTS VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+19) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 21
RAW MILKERS VS STICKY LACES (+11) -- RAW MILKERS BY 8

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY 

• Two unbeatens, one D4 crown: are Not So Sticky (4‑0) and the Tater Thots (3‑0) actually the two best teams, or is someone else about to crash the party? Those two teams are impressively on top of D4, but it’s hard to call them the two best teams. Coochie Monsters, Skeleton Crew, and Blue Ballers all exist. 

• The Malones draw Sticky Bandits AND Frodo this week. Do they steal one, or is 0‑5 on the table? 0-5 is very, very much on the table. However, if the rumors about Garrett being injured are true, that changes things, and we could see The Malones knock off Frodo this week. 

• Which halfway favorite (Sticky Bandits, Bullet Club, Grey Hair, VS, Irish Giants) is the FIRST to get knocked off, and by whom? I have a feeling that we’ll be seeing Grey Hair or Bullet Club lose first, potentially this week even. 

• Is The System (1‑4) officially cooked, or does a Week 5 date with PWI save the season? They’re not officially cooked, but they’re on their way. This week’s game with PWI pretty much is a “kitchen sink” game for them. They need to win this one. A blowout loss might be too demoralizing to come back from. 

• Which dog on the machine's fade card actually cashes — Mike's +2, Coochie +1, or a D4 special? Bet Coochie +1 and enjoy the winnings. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

-Breakfast Club Predictions: 

D’s Nutz 31, Carly-fornia Dreaming 27

Steph Infection 24, Meagan It Happen 20

Megoonsta’s 30, Missydemeanor 22

-Games of the day: 

• 10:00 - Can’t Touch This vs Freeballers

• 11:00 - Blitzkrieg vs Pit Harade

• 12:00 - Room 40 vs Wet Bandits

• 1:00 - Frodo Swaggins vs The Malones

• 2:00 - Grey Hair Don’t Care vs Practice Squad

• 3:00 - BQI vs DXYZ

-I believe in SBG. Look out for them the rest of the way. 

-Remaining undefeated team count: 8. Remaining winless team count: 3. Do we get one of each? 

-Best Avg PF: Cunning Stunts 44.8. Best Avg PA: TMA 16.4. 

-The Wet Bandits have played the toughest schedule so far this season with a .775 Opponent Win Percentage. 

-This is a big week for Buddy Lee teams. The luster is lost from PWI and the Freeballers, but having him not play for a couple of weeks is the culprit there. A big week from him and those teams are right back on the map. 

-I don’t know what TSL team hell is, but it feels like the Two Tuddies are in it right now. Which makes no sense because they’re all delightful people. Or are they? 

-D’z Nuts is going to win Breakfast Club. 

-One of the Balls team in D4 is about to go on a run. I just can’t figure out which one. 

-GF OUT

WEEK 6 THOUGHTS, PICKS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 02 October 2026 18:14

Published: Friday, 02 October 2026 18:14

Written by Topper

Hits: 148

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, it took one week on the back half of the TSL Fall 2026 schedule for team to not only lock in and get serious, but for new teams to loudly announce their official claims to the metaphorical throne that is Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality. 

In D1, Can’t Touch This crashed the party, disposing of the Freeballers (and slapping them back into the reality that they’re simply the TSL’s version of the Cleveland Browns) and then walking up to the Sticky Bandits and slapping them in the teeth, handing them their first loss. Oh, and what was that noise? That was the sound of The Malones stomping a mud hole in Frodo Swaggins and walking it dry to the tune of 84 points after taking Sticky to their breaking point. We are SO back. 

D2 saw Let’s Get Reccked dispatch of Bullet Club as they’re appearing to have gotten on the same page and finally figured out this football thing. Ricky Recckio was said to have loudly exclaimed that “only The System is dead in D2!”  

D3 didn’t give anything we didn’t know already, but Mike’s Detailing made sure to slide into the “contenders” half of the division, hitting a sweet dragon uppercut to Practice Squad that may have sent them straight to the spring. 

D4 gave us the Coochie Monsters munching on some Tater Thots and easily handling them. And the Flying Balls? More like Flying to the top of the standings, as they sit at 3-1-1 in 2nd place. Oh, and the PowerPuff Girls might’ve finally woken up. This is still a 10 team Thunderdome. 

Next up, Blitzkrieg said they’ve got (D) five on it, sending Pit Harade rumbling down the standings on the way as they took over first place. 

And oh man, D6! D6 showed us….okay absolutely nothing we didn’t know. D6 showed us we needed a D7 for the bottom half of the division. Select, Irish Giants, Raw Milkers with a hint of SBG. We get it. 

New contenders had a coming out party in Week 5, now it’s on the established contenders to dole out some counter punches in Week 6, or get out of the way. 

D1

Can't Touch This had the day of their season so far: a 49‑47 dub over the Freeballers and then a systematic 38‑29 takedown of the Sticky Bandits. CTT is a team nobody wants to see. And then The Malones, who couldn't crack 30 all year, hung 84 on Frodo Swaggins, mistreating Garrett in a way he usually has to pay good money for. The Malones did this after dropping a 56‑49 shootout to Sticky earlier. Frodo’s bad day continued with a 52‑6 loss to Eyes Downtown. It's getting late early for Frodo.

STICKY BANDITS vs FRODO SWAGGINS (+13) - Ok Frodo, it can’t get any worse than last week. And word is that this all stems from a QB injury, but Immortality doesn’t care for excuses. Sticky was a play or two away from an 0-2 week last weekend and they’ll more than likely treat this as a “get right” game. STICKY BANDITS BY 16

EYES DOWNTOWN vs CAN’T TOUCH THIS (+7) - CTT’s ambition to collect all of the D1 Infinity Stones continues and with Eyes Downtown seemingly at full power, they picked a hell of a time to go at them. The reigning, defending, champions of the Social Co-Ed Touch Football Universe haven’t even reached their final form yet, but they’re close. Stopping a new threat in its tracks will help them get there. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

FREEBALLERS VS THE MALONES (+11) - it’s downright disrespectful for The Malones to be double digit underdogs in this game. Both of these franchises are getting right back to what they do best. For The Malones, that means putting up oodles of points, Rhace making no less than 3 people wanting to hit him with a lead pipe, and then rocking at the bar. For the Freeballers, it means not living up to expectations and rounding into form as the “second bye week” for the D1 playoffs. THE MALONES BY 8

D2

Let's Get Reccked finally lived up to their D1 DNA, announcing themselves to the divison in beating Bullet Club 34‑13. Bullet Club drops to 4‑1 and the division just got a lot more interesting, because BQI kept pace by surviving DXYZ 35‑31 and now sit 4‑2, tied with BC on points, but down in the head to head for now. PWI handled The System 30‑14 and quietly climbed to 3‑1, while The System's freefall continued to 1‑5. Andrew Kicak’s petition to Jeff Krol to have them “just like, you know, switch places” with Grey Hair was met with hearty belly laugh. 

BULLET CLUB VS BQI (+2) - BQI had this game immediately circled on the calendar when they lost to Bullet Club in Week 1, and they couldn’t be happier to be catching them after a loss and regressing back to the mean. Of course, BC didn’t have their QB last week, or their gaggle of girls in tow, which tends to lead to losses like last week. Hopefully both teams are at full power for this tilt. Game of the day. BQI BY 1

THE SYSTEM VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+1) - Whatever is happening to The System, the rest of the TSL better hope it isn’t contagious. DXYZ were THIS close to knocking off BQI last week, and things are looking up for them. D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 12

PWI VS LET’S GET RECCKED (+11) - I think PWI has been kind of forgotten about considering they’ve only played 4 games so far this season. While they’re under the radar slightly, LGR leaped onto everyone else’s radar the last couple of games (except for the odds makers it seems), as they’ve been finding what works for them and executing well. This will be a battle. LET’S GET RECCKED BY 2. 

D3

Grey Hair - Don't Care is 6‑0 with relatively easy wins over Practice Squad and Cobblestone. Cunning Stunts kept pace with a 52‑38 win over Buffalo Vice. The real victim was Practice Squad, who drew a brutal doubleheader and lost both: first to Grey Hair and then to Mike's Detailing, who climbs to 3‑2 and into third.

COBBLESTONE VS BUFFALO VICE (+2) - A battle of the bottoms as these two teams are a combined 1-9. Buffalo Vice has had some good performances and just haven’t been rewarded for them. That’s going to change. BUFFALO VICE BY 10

GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE VS MIKE’S DETAILING (+15) - Mike’s Detailing can shock the TSL Universe with a win here. It’s not like they’re incapable of it, but they’re just getting a stupidly locked in GHDC team and it’s hard to beat them when they’re in this higher plane of existence. GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 9

CUNNING STUNTS VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+11) - The Stunts have been a buzz saw for weeks now, cutting down anyone in their way as they prepare for a showdown with Grey Hair soon enough. Practice Squad has had a tough season and one has to wonder if B’s newfound celebrity status as a TikTok star has him less focused on football. Time will tell. CUNNING STUNTS BY 13

D4

Not So Sticky stayed perfect at 5‑0 with a win over Two Tuddies, but that’s the most boring part of D4. Coochie Monsters handled the Tater Thots 38‑18 to leap up the standings. Flying Balls crushed Balls Deep 37‑6. PowerPuff Girls finally turned potential into points, blasting Skeleton Crew 42‑18, and Blue Ballers edged a game Golfing squad but what’s wrong with their offense?

COOCHIE MONSTERS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+14) - Golfing hasn’t had much to enjoy about this season so far. It’s not going to get better this week with a double header of doom. COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 10

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+11) - Like I said, doom. GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 12

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS FLYING BALLS (+2) - Now we’re getting spicy. A marquee matchup for this division this week. Thots just got humbled. Flying Balls are starting to look like the team that took the league by storm a couple of seasons ago. Something’s gotta give. I believe in these Balls. FLYING BALLS BY 4

NOT SO STICKY VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) - The Blue Ballers used to score points so often and so quickly it was being discussed how they can be harnessed as a renewable energy source. AND THEN…they just decided to stop being good at it. 20. 18. 36. 23. They used to do that in 10 minutes. Not a full game. Someone said they might have a QB holdout situation, and if that’s the problem, pay that man his money and stop screwing around. Oh, and Not So Sticky is good. NOT SO STICKY BY 14

 
POWERPUFF GIRLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+10) - it used to be fun to joke about the Tud Buds being not great because you’d always just assume they’d get it together and be fine. And then they just kinda forgot that part. Meanwhile, the PowerPuff Girls are smack dab in the middle of getting it together. Results are mixed but trending upwards. Sorry Tuddies. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 16

D5

Blitzkrieg went 2‑0 on the day a 38‑36 win over Wet Bandits and then a 44‑16 demolition of Pit Harade to surge to 4‑2 and the top of the division. The 716ers pulled a 24‑19 upset of Come From Behind, and Wet Bandits split, bouncing back to hammer Room 40 30‑12 after the loss to Blitzkrieg. 

VICTORIOUS SECRET VS BLITZKRIEG (+12) - LETS GO!! Fall Blitzkrieg, led by Light Red Hoodie Guy, took the top spot in the standings from Victorious Secret just in time for this battle. BK has the experience and the female talent to hang with VS, who might also be suffering from a little rust after a few weeks off. BLITZKRIEG BY 7

PIT HARADE VS ROOM 40 (+1) - Pit Harade got hit by a bus last week, and they’ll be looking to get it together against an up and down Room 40 team that’s still working out some kinks. They can’t sleep on them though. PIT HARADE BY 3

TMA VS COME FROM BEHIND (+3) - TMA kicks off a double header this week with Come From Behind in what should be a great battle with some veteran teams. TMA has had no problem in D5 so far this season, and if they have a full roster they should win every game or at least keep it close. CFB is in the middle of trying to get accustomed to a newer (for them) QB, which leads to inconsistent results. TMA BY 6

TMA VS PIT HARADE (+11) - The second game for both teams that may have some future tiebreaker implications as well. This should be a hell of a clash on paper, not to mention it’s a bit of a who’s who of long time TSL celebrities. This should be a fun one. TMA BY 12

716ERS VS WET BANDITS (+4) - Both teams have been trending up. 716ers pulled off a win, and the Wet Bandits might be 1-2 in their last 3 games but they lost to PH and BK by 3 and by 2 so they’re a couple of plays away from being the talk of the division. This should be a great game. WET BANDITS BY 2

D6

Raw Milkers (4‑0) and the Irish Giants (3‑0) both stayed unbeaten with some easy wins. Raw Milkers won 33‑7 over Sticky Laces, the Giants a 40‑0 shutout of the Trophes. Select stayed in the hunt with a 46‑31 win over SBG. 

SBG VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+9) - Cat-Tastrophe finds themselves where SBG found themselves a season ago. That could mean the future is bright for them. Just, the future isn’t right now. SBG BY 16

IRISH GIANTS VS RAW MILKERS (+9) - ANOTHER AMAZING GAME! ITS ON!! The Milkers are exuding confidence this season and have self-anoited themselves as the team to beat. The Irish Giants have taken offense to that and they’re looking to put the Milkers in their place. Should be a battle. IRISH GIANTS BY 7

SELECT VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+22) - Select doesn’t really like to allow points, which is good since B&C doesn’t like to score any. A match made in heaven. SELECT BY 28

BENGAY BANDITS VS STICKY LACES (+3) - Here we have a very good mid card fight between two talented teams that should believe they have a chance to be included in the championship conversations, but they have to clean up some stuff over the next three weeks. This one comes down to the wire. BENGAY BANDITS BY 2

TSC vs THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS (Week 5):
The Godfather: 15‑9 SU, 7‑15‑2 ATS
The TSC: 16‑8 SU, 8‑14‑2 ATS

SEASON:
The Godfather: 68‑36‑3 SU, 54‑50‑3 ATS
The TSC: 57‑47‑3 SU, 44‑60‑3 ATS

This might have been the first time this season the machine beat me. I’ve been killing predictions. Shout out to everyone doing what they’re told. 

THE TSC'S PICKS:

D1
STICKY BANDITS VS FRODO SWAGGINS (+13) -- STICKY BANDITS BY 15
EYES DOWNTOWN VS CAN'T TOUCH THIS (+7) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 4
FREEBALLERS VS THE MALONES (+11) -- FREEBALLERS BY 8

D2
BULLET CLUB VS BQI (+2) -- BQI BY 2
THE SYSTEM VS D-GENERATION X Y AND Z (+1) -- D-GENERATION X Y AND Z BY 1
PWI VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+11) -- PWI BY 8

D3
COBBLESTONE VS BUFFALO VICE (+2) -- BUFFALO VICE BY 2
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+15) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 17
CUNNING STUNTS VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+11) -- CUNNING STUNTS BY 8

D4
COOCHIE MONSTERS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+14) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 16
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS I'D RATHER BE GOLFING (+11) -- GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 8
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS FLYING BALLS (+2) -- FLYING BALLS BY 2
NOT SO STICKY VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 2
POWERPUFF GIRLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+10) -- POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 7

D5
VICTORIOUS SECRET VS BLITZKRIEG (+12) -- VICTORIOUS SECRET BY 14
PIT HARADE VS ROOM 40 (+1) -- ROOM 40 BY 1
TMA VS COME FROM BEHIND (+3) -- COME FROM BEHIND BY 2
TMA VS PIT HARADE (+11) -- TMA BY 8
716ERS VS WET BANDITS (+4) -- WET BANDITS BY 1

D6
SBG VS CAT-TASTROPHE (+9) -- SBG BY 6
IRISH GIANTS VS RAW MILKERS (+9) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 6
SELECT VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+22) -- SELECT BY 24
BENGAY BANDITS VS STICKY LACES (+3) -- STICKY LACES BY 2

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY 

• Seriously, what is going on with The System that they’re so incredibly ass this season? Joe Miano just ends up being a way better QB when he doesn’t have to “deal” with Andrew Kicak’s meddling. This is ending up as the worst fusion since Veku (there is some nerd somewhere that wasn’t expecting to see that here today) or maybe since sushi pizza. 

• While there are so many big games this week, the game I have my eye on the most is the 716ers vs Wet Bandits contest in D5. Two teams with a lot of potential that are playing sneakily well? Sign me up. 

• Can't Touch This beat the Sticky Bandits last week and now gets Eyes Downtown. Are they officially the hottest team in D1? Yes, by a landslide. Ryan Dougherty is the league’s best QB, regardless of what the biased QB rankings committee (that must be made up of Bobby, Joey, and Mike Thomas) say.

• Victorious Secret vs Blitzkrieg is going to be a war, but Irish Giants vs Raw Milkers is going to be the game you’re going to want to watch this weekend. 

• The Blue Ballers lack of scoring is still concerning, so I’m wondering if they’re going to get their QB back before the season ends or if they’re already giving up? How they come out against Not So Sticky will tell us all we need to know. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS BEFORE SATURDAY

• Signs of life from DXYZ is a good thing. The league is simply better when they’re playing well. BQI might’ve gotten lucky. 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Blitzkrieg vs Victorious Secret

• 11:00 - Can’t Touch This vs Eyes Downtown

• 12:00 - BQI vs Bullet Club

• 1:00 - Blue Ballers vs Not So Sticky

• 2:00 - 716ers vs Wet Bandits

• 3:00 - Let’s Get Reccked vs PWI

• Breakfast Club Predictions:

• Steph Infection 22, Missydemeanor 14

• Carly-fornia Dreaming 40, Meagan It Happen 26

• D’s Nutz 37, Megoonsta’s 36

• Even as the league turns to October, it seems we’ve avoided any terrible weather game days, which can only mean the playoffs are in trouble.

• Grey Hair Don’t Care, Victorious Secret, and the top D6 teams all lead the category of “teams that are going to move up a division regardless of winning” as of now. 

• The TSL Banquet is right around the corner. It usually happens in the beginning of December, which means we’ll be hearing about the date soon enough. Prepare your livers. 

• Four unbeaten teams remain: Not So Sticky, Grey Hair Don’t Care, Raw Milkers, and Irish Giants. 

• If people could stop falling and landing awkwardly on Field 3 that would be great. You’re all messing the ground up and making the field all lumpy. A little grace would be nice. Also, stop with celebratory headbutts for good plays please. 

• Sticky Laces needs to get it together soon. 

• Don’t forget that the league has a ton of media out there for your pleasure every week: The Power Rankings, The Lenny Alba Variety Hour, The TSL Podcast, and the TSC come at you every single week! Enjoy! 

-GF OUT

WEEK 4 THOUGHTS, PREDICTIONS, AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 18 September 2026 15:12

Published: Friday, 18 September 2026 15:12

Written by Topper

Hits: 284

It’s crazy to think that after a ridiculously long summer where we painstakingly waited for the start of the Fall season, we’re already staring Week 4 dead in the face. After this week, we end up on the downslope of the season, as October and the start of the Race For Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality will be able to be seen in the distance. This league moves way too fast, which tracks because time flies when you’re having fun or whatever, right? Well, most of us are having fun anyway. The Malones are definitely not having fun this season. Let’s Get Reccked is absolutely not having fun this season. Cobblestone may or may not be having fun this season but it’s always hard to tell because I’m never really sure who’s been here “this season” compared to “just this week”. I’d Rather Be Golfing isn’t having fun this time around and would probably rather be golfing. Blitzed and Confused has been playing true to their namesake, but perhaps they’re kind of having fun? It’s hard to tell. 

Other teams are definitely having super amounts of fun, like the Sticky Bandits, for instance. 3-0, perched on top of D1 for now. Bullet Club is having fun in the “New D2”. Grey Hair is continuing the fun in D3. Not So Sticky and the Thots are having a ball. Victorious Secret are the only team that’s super having fun but lost a game (They’re 3-1). The Raw Milkers are having super amounts of fun. 

Breakfast Club is fun. 

Everyone else is having different levels of fun but fun nonetheless. This is a fun league after all. 

You know what else is fun? Predictions. 

D1

The battle of the unbeatens went to Sticky, who edged Eyes Downtown 28-25 to grab sole possession of the D1 throne for now, but they had to do it against a Bobby-less ED.  Can't Touch This finally got in the win column, and doesn't that feel overdue? I told you 0-2 was a lie.. The Malones, meanwhile, drop to 0-3 and the alarm bells are officially deafening. And the Freeballers came crashing back to Earth in the worst way - Going 0-2 in the doubleheader with losses to the Legends AND Frodo, going from 66-point darlings to a very humbling Saturday. It’s very clearly Buddy Lee’s fault for not showing up. And like we figured, the Legends are rounding into form, so good luck everyone else. .

EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+10) - The Malones are definitely in trouble and it’s hard to imagine that they’ll dig themselves out of it having to play the defending champions. Sometimes teams just have lost seasons, and this might just be their turn. Malones vs Everybody has become Malones vs Themselves. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 17

LEGENDS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+1) - An absolute world class barnburner could be in store here. The Legends definitely didn’t forget about the 33-16 Week 1 loss, and they very rarely lose to the same team more than once in a season. They learn from their mistakes. LEGENDS BY 2

D2

Bullet Club is looking like the best team in this division after a  2-0 week, with wins over The System and DXYZ, and they're now a perfect 4-0 on the season. BQI keeps pace by handling LGR pretty easily. 

BQI VS THE SYSTEM (+6) - The System may need to work out some kinks sooner rather than later as the preseason favorites are starting to fall behind the other contenders in the division. Kicak usually has them playing a bit better than this. Meanwhile Bridget continues to find her form and settle in as BQI seems locked in. BQI BY 3

THE SYSTEM VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) - For as discombobulated as The System feels like they are, LGR just is. It hasn’t been a banner year for this squad and that may just come down to getting the new players more acclimated with Seth. But for now, they’re the wounded zebra by a pack of Lions, and The System are licking their chops. THE SYSTEM BY 12

D3

Darryl Carr QB Superstar did everything he could in the 64 - 42 track meet between Cunning Stunts and Cobblestone, but fell short as the Stunts went 2-0 on the day and suddenly look like a real problem. Grey Hair kept right on rolling, hanging 44 on Practice Squad to stay perfect and atop the division, still not caring, still winning. 

GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) - GHDC continues running through the division and have the good people of Buffalo Vice in their way next. I’ll be honest, it’s hard to really judge Vice this season. They forfeited, they got a forfeit win, and then they lost to Practice Squad by a point. It’s hard to really figure out who they are this season, and I’m sure it’s frustrating for them too. We’ll learn a lot this week. GREY HAIR - DON’T CARE BY 9

 COBBLESTONE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) -  If that’s the Cobblestone team for realsies, Darryl Carr QB Superstar might be staring down the barrel of his first Darryl Carr QB Superstar QB of the Year award in quite some time at the banquet. B will be there to stand in his way, but right now it doesn’t seem like they’d be able to hang with Darryl’s squad. COBBLESTONE BY 3

CUNNING STUNTS VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+5) - The real answer to “Who are Mike’s Detailing this season?” will show up today as they get the litmus test that is the Stunts. Like Vice, Mike’s D has had a weird season with a forfeit win, a weird 1 point win against the CobbleBallers, and GHDC blew them out. If they Stunts (who are on a roll) walk all over them, there’s going to be a lot of work to do here. If not? D3 just got more interesting. CUNNING STUNTS BY 8

D4

Balls Deep bounced back to knock off the Coochie Monsters 21-14, because in this division there are no easy buckets. Not So Sticky survived an absolute thriller over the PowerPuff Girls, 37-36, to stay perfect and keep themselves atop the standings. The Skeleton Crew got in the win column handling Golfing, and the Tater Thots ground out a gritty 22-18 win over Two Tuddies. D4 is a lot of fun to watch, but probably stressful to play in.

NOT SO STICKY VS SKELETON CREW (+3) - Sticky Lite vs Wanderers Lite. A fun little matchup that almost feels like a spinoff show of sorts. The Crew got on the board with a win over Golfing, but now they get to jump up the standings to play the top team in the division. It’s going to suck for them. NOT SO STICKY BY 14

COOCHIE MONSTERS VS FLYING BALLS (+6) - The Coochie Monsters looked great, and they looked not so great against Balls Deep. They get a Flying Balls team that still has some things to figure out this season themselves, so it’ll come down to which team gets a handle on it sooner. COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 8

GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) - The Blue Ballers are apparently without their QB for the next few weeks as Phil The Thrill is off getting some sort of super secret Stem Cell injections to make him even more dominant during games. Unfortunately for the Ballers, they get a much better than very good Thots team who is chomping at the bit to get another win. GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS BY 16

SKELETON CREW VS BALLS DEEP (+8) - Balls Deep continues to get no respect from the oddsmakers, but you can see why. They’re 2-2 with a negative 29 point differential. It’s hard to get a true handle on a Bi-Polar team like this, but perhaps they’re on their way to figuring things out completely. BALLS DEEP BY 3

FLYING BALLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+4) - The Flying Balls get the Tud Buds in their second game, and the Tuddies are still a bit of a mystery on who they are this season. By all accounts they looked good against the Thots, and if they play that way here, they should walk away with the win. TWO TUDDIES BY 11

I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS TWO TUDDIES (+1) - The Tuddies are better than Golfing. Golfing has some real work to do. TWO TUDDIES BY 18

D5

Victorious Secret just put up 70 points with ease against the Wet Bandits, and they are rolling!  But before that, the shocker of the week belonged to the same Wet Bandits, who knocked off TMA 22-16. TMA, the team that beat VS earlier this season. D5 is stupid. In other news, Pit Harade demolished the 716ers by 42, and Room 40 snuck past CFB for their first win. D5 is now the only division where everyone has at least one win and one loss. 

BLITZKRIEG VS COME FROM BEHIND (+4) - Blitzkrieg looks to continue rocking along as they get a CFB team that hasn’t had a great couple of weeks due to some iffy personnel issues. They’re still in the games, so when the team all shows up, look out D5. But for right now BK just feels a bit more stable (which tracks, have you met Molly?). BLITZKRIEG BY 9

TMA VS 716ERS (+10) - The 716ers had quite the rough go at it last week against Pit Harade, and now they get a TMA team that just puked all over themselves in a loss to the Wet Bandits. Usually that means TMA gets it together and takes out their frustrations on their next opponent. TMA BY 7

ROOM 40 VS 716ERS (+1) - Room 40 popped into the win column last week, and they’re looking to keep the good vibes going. The only problem is that they’ll be getting a 716ers team that has been pretty good other than last week’s anomaly. Guessing they lose to TMA is one thing, Room 40 is another. 716ERS BY 8

PIT HARADE VS WET BANDITS (+10) - Pit Harade put up an impressive 48-6 win last week that makes me think the top two teams in D5 wear pink. The Wet Bandits did get the nice win over TMA, but that good karma was decimated by VS later on. I’ll take the hotter team here. PIT HARADE BY 9

D6

Select is officially the hottest team in D6 not named the Raw Milkers with a nice win over Sticky Laces. SBG got their first W and did it emphatically, shutting out Blitzed and Confused 31-0. Blitzed and Confused are struggling pretty hard so far this season but there’s still time. The Bengay Bandits bounced back nicely from their own shutout loss, handling Cat-Tastrophe 28-8.

SELECT VS RAW MILKERS (+1) - BIG GAME ALERT! Select and the Raw Milkers are here to battle for D6 supremacy, as the winner will move into 1st in the division. Well, the Milkers would stay there, but you get it. Both teams are ranked in the Top 10 of the TSL rankings system, and this should be a doozy. Standings chaos reigns. SELECT BY 10

BENGAY BANDITS VS SBG (+4) - Don’t look now but SBG might be waking up. They might be just as good as the BBs. They turn a lot of “mights” into definites this week. SBG BY 3

CAT-TASTROPHE VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+6) - The Trophes have been solid so far and it’s clear that they’ve played football before. Allegedly so have BAC, but you’d be hard pressed to believe it. CAT-TASTROPHE BY 3

IRISH GIANTS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) - And it doesn’t get better for BAC, getting the Irish Giants up next and they’ve been well rested for this game. IRISH GIANTS BY 14

TSC VS THE GODFATHER

LAST WEEK'S RESULTS:

The Godfather: 12-8 SU, 12-8 ATS
The TSC: 8-12 SU, 8-12 ATS

SEASON:

The Godfather: 43-19-1 SU, 38-24-1 ATS
The TSC: 32-30-1 SU, 27-35-1 ATS

THE TSC'S PICKS:

D1
EYES DOWNTOWN VS THE MALONES (+10) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 13
LEGENDS VS EYES DOWNTOWN (+1) -- EYES DOWNTOWN BY 2

D2
BQI VS THE SYSTEM (+6) -- BQI BY 9
THE SYSTEM VS LET'S GET RECCKED (+7) -- THE SYSTEM BY 4

D3
GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE VS BUFFALO VICE (+14) -- GREY HAIR - DON'T CARE BY 17
COBBLESTONE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (+1) -- PRACTICE SQUAD BY 3
CUNNING STUNTS VS MIKE'S DETAILING (+5) -- CUNNING STUNTS BY 7

D4
NOT SO STICKY VS SKELETON CREW (+3) -- NOT SO STICKY BY 5
COOCHIE MONSTERS VS FLYING BALLS (+6) -- COOCHIE MONSTERS BY 3
GREAT VALUE TATER THOTS VS BLUE BALLERS (+5) -- BLUE BALLERS BY 1
SKELETON CREW VS BALLS DEEP (+8) -- BALLS DEEP BY 2
FLYING BALLS VS TWO TUDDIES (+4) -- FLYING BALLS BY 6
I'D RATHER BE GOLFING VS TWO TUDDIES (+1) -- TWO TUDDIES BY 2

D5
BLITZKRIEG VS COME FROM BEHIND (+4) -- BLITZKRIEG BY 6
TMA VS 716ERS (+10) -- TMA BY 13
ROOM 40 VS 716ERS (+1) -- 716ERS BY 2
PIT HARADE VS WET BANDITS (+10) -- PIT HARADE BY 14

D6
SELECT VS RAW MILKERS (+1) -- SELECT BY 3
BENGAY BANDITS VS SBG (+4) -- BENGAY BANDITS BY 6
CAT-TASTROPHE VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+6) -- CAT-TASTROPHE BY 8
IRISH GIANTS VS BLITZED AND CONFUSED (+15) -- IRISH GIANTS BY 18

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

Are we going to do anything about the dips in Field 3? While Field 3 might have a few “nuances” to it, it’s not that different than the other fields. If anyone knows someone that wants to roll the fields, let the League Office know

Bullet Club is 4-0 and winning games by a wide margin. Are they the best team in D2? Bullet Club has certainly come out of the gate hot, knocking off everyone in the division besides LGR so far. BQI and PWI can’t wait for another shot at them. As of right now BC is on top of the mountain, but any of those 3 teams could be considered “best”. 

Can't Touch This finally got their first D1 win, do they go on a run? There’s nothing quite like getting the monkey off your back and losing the stress of having to get that “first win” in D1. That should let CTT relax just ever so slightly, which should only propel them to more wins. D1 continues to be loads of fun. 

Cunning Stunts just went 2-0 including a 64-point outburst. Did we underrate them, or is that a D3 mirage? Everyone knows how good the Stunts can be, just sometimes it takes them a second to get going. But once they do (and I believe they have) look out. They’re a collection of some of the most talented women in the league with Joey Batts at QB who is one of the smartest people to ever do it. At least that's what he tells me. 

We've got Legends-Eyes Downtown AND Select-Raw Milkers this week, which one are you circling hardest? Both games are must watch for sure, but right now it feels like Select - Milkers just means more, so that might be the game to pay attention to more. 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

-We’re just about halfway through the season yet somehow we still have three teams with only one game played. Those teams will more than likely factor into the playoff race and shake up  where we THINK we’re headed currently.

-The overrated: Freeballers, The System, Coochie Monsters, Bengay Bandits

-The underrated: Frodo, DXYZ, Practice Squad, Powerpuff Girls, Pit Harade, SBG

-Breakfast Club Predictions:

-Steph Infection 30, Megoonsta’s 27

-D’s Nutz 33, Meagan It Happen 28

-Carly-fornia Dreaming 40, Missydemeanor 31

-Games of the Day: 

10:00 - Raw Milkers vs Select

11:00 - Coochie Monsters vs Flying Balls

12:00 - Balls Deep vs Skeleton Crew

1:00 - BQI vs The System

2:00 - Eyes Downtown vs Legends

3:00 - Cunning Stunts vs Mike’s Detailing

-Sticky Bandits are sitting at 3-0, Not So Sticky is at 3-0, it’s very clear that referees are favoring teams with Jeff Krol on them. Reminds me of the old Topper days. 

-Remaining undefeated teams: 8. Still not sure that anyone will finish the season that way. 

-The Powerpuff Girls are 1-3, but there’s no denying that they’re awesome. They need to stop losing by one point though. Get it together ladies. 

-D3 is weird and hard to get a handle on thanks to the various forfeits and Darryl-ing. Once we get another couple of weeks under our belts, maybe it’ll be easier to figure out. Probably not. 

-The System needs to win against BQI this week to save their season before it starts to spiral out of control. Confidence can be a wonderful thing. 

If you have something to say email me anytime at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.. As you know I do not give out my phone as I live in a log cabin in Des Moines, Iowa and do not get cell service. 

-GF OUT.