WEEK 3 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 29 August 2025 12:37

Published: Friday, 29 August 2025 12:37

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1302

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the TSL Fall 2025 season is already past the quarter pole of the season as the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality’s eight week Qualifying Round Where Everyone Qualifies continues. For those not in on the joke, since all of you are going to make the playoffs, the “regular season” pretty much exists solely for you to determine your seeding heading into the playoffs, with a side of “trying to earn a bye week” mixed in. 

 

And while some people say they’d MUCH rather “play an extra game than get a bye week”, let me caution the newbies really quickly: The TSL playoffs has proven to be nothing but a graveyard of better seeded teams getting upset for a variety of reasons. Avoiding a chance to be one of those teams is completely the way to go. You have six more weeks of hot TSL action to get it together and earn one of those bye weeks, provided you’re allowed one. For the first time in forever, there won’t be a bye in D1. D2 will give away two of them, as usual. D3, ever the TSL’s Thunderdome, will not have its seemingly customary four team first round. D4 gives you a bye for the top seed, D5 gives you nothing, and D6 is an animal all to itself, where the contenders for immortality will want to be in the Top 4 come October. 

 

Now that you have an idea of why these games are important (for some of you anyway), keep in mind that even if you’ve gotten off to a rough, 0-2 start (Here’s looking at you Mavericks, Grey Hair Don’t Care, GirthQuakes, Practice Squad, Mike’s Detailing, Pit Harade, and the Puck Bunnies), or an 0-2-1 start (Mo’ Chicken), or an 0-3 start (Cobblestone), or an 0-4 start (Raw Milkers!) you still have hope. Okay, Cobblestone and the Raw Milkers probably don’t have any hope at a bye week for the playoffs at this point, but you get my point. The season is still young. It’s basically a 21 year old that just started drinking; there’s going to be some mistakes made. But it’s not how you start, it’s how you finish. So have some faith. 

 

As for the teams that are 2-0 and having a good start to the season, of course there’s no rule that says you’re going to eventually crumble at the finish line. You could be starting the foundation of your championship early, each win so far representing the true building block of hope that it represents. So far, the 2-0 teams have been a nice mix of “Not So Surprising” - (Legends, Sticky Bandits, The Malones, PowerPuff Girls) to “Okay, I’m Mildly Surprised” (Two Tuddies, Buffalo Vice) to “Oh Wow, I’m Pretty Surprised!” (Bridget & Quit It, Balls Deep, The Chargers, Select).

 

The best thing about all of the teams I just listed is that it’s a pretty good mix of long time TSL franchises (Buffalo Vice, Sticky Bandits), teams that took their lumps early on but have put in the time and effort to improve every season to become a top team (The Malones, Two Tuddies, Balls Deep, and yes, even the PowerPuff Girls, who despite arguably being the TSL’s pound for pound champion, took a little time to figure it out and get here), teams that have only been good because they stole all of the league’s top players and ruined the competition around them but tried to justify it because they trot out the league’s best 5 foot 3 supermodel turned QB but grew into quite the little family over the years and have weirdly become a feel good story that’s just waiting for a face turn but there hasn’t been a big enough heel team to get on their level just yet and it might be too late because they’ll just retire as a team before that happens (Legends), and some Brand New teams too! (Bridget & Quit It, The Chargers, and Select - the first two are in their first session, and Select is in their second.)

 

Of course, schedules may get harder, opponents who seem weak right now will get stronger (looking at you, Practice Squad. What the hell are you doing at 0-2 B? I’m assuming Kenny “The Good” Lantz hasn’t played a game yet), and more teams will get on the same page with each other. Usually, right around Week 3 is when you’re just starting to show improvements….or that you’re probably who you are. But this session, Week 3 is the “chaos” week where crazy things are more likely to happen, as it’s Labor Day weekend (the Spring Session gives us Memorial Day weekend for this, I’ve always enjoyed the symmetry). 

 

With Labor Day sort of the unofficially official “End of Summer”, we get lots of teams requesting bye weeks (for instance, we only have 37 of the league’s 49 franchises playing this weekend, with seven teams playing doubleheaders), and even the teams that DO play tend to be missing a few players because they have to go to out of town, or they’re camping, or they’re at a family shindig, etc. The TSL team group texts have had lots of excuses this week of why people are missing games. Because of this, the potential for games to give us crazy results increases tenfold, at least. So, while you shouldn’t read too deeply into this week’s results when it comes to winning Immortality, you should pay attention to the games anyway, because they can all be really, really fun. 

 

 D1

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Sticky Bandits 37, Eyes Downtown 29

Unit Ha Ha 26, Mavericks 21

Frodo Swaggins 22, What A Dump 22

Legends 35, What A Dump 14

 

D1 is on its way to giving us three tiers within itself. There’s the Championship tier with the Legends, Sticky and Eyes Downtown, the middle teams with Frodo, WAD, and MAYBE Unit Ha Ha, and then the lower tier that trots out the Mavericks and Freeballers. Sticky stayed undefeated with a big win over Eyes Downtown last week. Unit Ha Ha got their first win of the season in a tight game against the Mavericks, who are still navigating D1 as a team and should only get better as the year goes on. Frodo Swaggins and What A Dump ran it back from a week prior which gave us a one point win for WAD, and this time the teams tied! Heck of a rivalry brewing there perhaps? WAD would then go on to get stomped by the Legends. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

EYES DOWNTOWN VS MAVERICKS (+8) - While the Mavs are still looking for their first D1 win, they already showed big time improvement from last week, even in a close loss. Eyes Downtown had a close loss of their own to Sticky, which gives us two teams with good QBs that both really want to win and get the losses out of their mind. This may come down to who blinks first. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 8

 

FRODO SWAGGINS VS MAVERICKS (+2) - Frodo is looking for their first win this season after a 1 point loss and a tie against WAD. While they would’ve been favored in this one anyway given the marked improvement Frodo has shown the last few seasons, I think the pressure is more on Frodo to get this done. I wonder how the Mavs would fare in this game if they didn’t have to play Frodo after playing a game against ED already? FRODO SWAGGINS BY 3

D2

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

The Malones 31, Can’t Touch This 24

Jabronies 44, Passing While Intoxicated* 26

Passing While Intoxicated* 49, Scared Hitless 18

Scared Hitless 37, Grey Hair Don’t Care 32

 

The Malones outlast Can’t Touch This in yet another banger by these two teams (That we get to see again this week!), meanwhile the Jabronies make easy work of PWI* in their D2 debut, but PWI* ended up getting things together not too much longer after, dunking on Scared Hitless 49-18. But then it was Scared Hitless’ turn to turn it around, as they squeaked out a much needed win against Grey Hair Don’t Care. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS SCARED HITLESS (+10) - Scared Hitless is going through some stuff right now internally with getting acclimated to a new QB and some new players as well. While they have a VERY talented team as usual, it’s just about putting it together for them. Right now, that is leading to a “not too great” defense, and when you’re playing one of the most complete teams in the TSL in CTT, that’s not a recipe for success. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 13

 

JABRONIES VS GREY HAIR DON’T CARE (+7) - Don’t look now, but we might have front row seats to the Joe Miano D2 QB MVP tour as the Jabronies seem poised to take the next step as they chase the D2 title. They seemed to have grown from last season, and right now they feel like they can just put up points on anyone. Grey Hair is 0-2, sure, but they’re a good team that isn’t getting blown out. If the Jabronies are “feeling themselves” a little too much, they could get here, but I think they’ll be okay. JABRONIES BY 2

 

THE MALONES VS CAN’T TOUCH THIS (EVEN) - Back to back weeks of this? The TSL scheduling gods have decided to smile upon us. Another good game last week that came down to the wire from what I was told, and there’s zero reason to think this one will be any different. Well, there will be ONE difference: CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 3

D3

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Bullet Club 34, GirthQuakes 27

Wanderers 47, Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 44

Buffalo Vice 46, Practice Squad 15

Cunning Stunts 52, D-Generation X, Y, and Z 47

To nobody’s surprise, D3 is a battleground no matter what the game. Bullet Club gets into the win column with a close win over the GQs, while the Wanderers played their first game of the season, and gave ILF the “Wanderers” treatment with a one score victory in their first “Welcome to D3” moment. Buffalo Vice embarrassed Practice Squad with a 31 point win, while the Stunts took the Katie Keller Bowl over DXYZ in a high scoring affair. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BUFFALO VICE VS D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z (+3) - Buffalo Vice is putting up some big time numbers so far this season, enough to at least make the Rules Committee consider drug testing them. They might be off to the best start of the TSL season. However, DXYZ and Team Keller are a play or two away from this being a battle of two undefeated teams playing for the division lead. DXYZ is playing too well to be 1-2. But this is going to be very close. D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z BY 1

 

BULLET CLUB VS INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS (EVEN) - If ILF has done anything in D3 so far this season, it’s that they’ve shown they belong. Both teams have wins over the GQs, but while ILF hung with the Wanderers, Bullet Club got soundly beaten by Vice, and now they get to continue their struggles against Buddy Lee, just on a different team. INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS BY 8

 

PRACTICE SQUAD VS GIRTHQUAKES (EVEN) - Something isn’t right with Practice Squad, and now they’re not even favored against the GirthQuakes? The GQs have played two tough teams, and we’ve been thinking they’re going to start winning a bit more sooner than later. Why not against a Practice Squad team that looks all sorts of out of sorts? It is a chaos week after all, isn’t it? GIRTHQUAKES BY 2

 

CUNNING STUNTS VS INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS (+3) - The Stunts showed up and showed out last week in their season debut, putting up 52 points against DXYZ. ILF has the ability to score just as many points as the Stunts, so it will come down to getting a stop for them. The thing is, ILF used to be a really defensive team, it's in their DNA. Someone will make that play and we’ll have a surprising 3-1 team after this weekend. INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS BY 2

 

CUNNING STUNTS VS GIRTHQUAKES (+10) - Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. The GQs had the shock of the season in the spring when they upset the Stunts in their game. The only problem for the GQs is that the Stunts remember that, and they’re not going to let that happen again. A focused Stunts team that’s even more invested in a game than usual? Sorry GQs. CUNNING STUNTS BY 18

D4

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

PowerPuff Girls 29, Ready To Retire 20

PowerPuff Girls 35, Cobblestone 22

Two Tuddies 30, Mike’s Detailing 22

Come From Behind 34, Cobblestone 18

 

The PPGs made their D4 debut and they didn’t disappoint. After shaking the rust off in a closer than they would’ve liked to win over RTR, the Girls proceeded to put up 35 points on Cobblestone to go to 2-0. Not to be outdone, the Tud Buds joined their D5 move up partners at 2-0 with a win over a very good Mike’s Detailing team. Come From Behind joined in the fun, racking up their first win of the year over Cobblestone, who might be 0-3, but the key thing here is that they haven’t forfeited yet! 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

PUCKETT ALL-STARS VS COME FROM BEHIND (+5) - Puckett looked really good two weeks ago after having a week off last week. Meanwhile CFB reversed their fortunes with a nice win over Cobblestone, but this will be a bit more of a test for them. This should be a good back and forth game that comes down to the wire. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 2

 

READY TO RETIRE VS COBBLESTONE (+7) - Okay, the excitement around Cobblestone running it back with the old crew feels like it’s tapered off and it shouldn’t. Of course it was going to take a little bit of time for everyone to get back on Darryl’s level, so maybe relax with the hate out there. However, it might be a little longer for that first win as they get RTR, which is a really good team that’s firing on all cylinders. Well, maybe just “most” cylinders. READY TO RETIRE BY 6

D5

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Stir The Sauce 15, Pit Harade 6

Balls Deep 48, Sausage McMuffins 20

Mo’ Chicken 13, Sausage McMuffins 13

Bridget & Quit It 40, Mo’ Chicken 0

 

Stir The Sauce got by Pit Harade in a defensive battle, while Balls Deep continued rocking in D5 with an easy win over the McMuffins. Things got worse for the McMuffins after they could only get 13 points in a tie with Mo’ Chicken. MO would go on to get crushed by Bridget and company. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS VS STIR THE SAUCE (+7) - The McMuffins might be in trouble. A season after being one of the top teams, they just seem off to me, and tying Mo’ Chicken (sorry MO) just seems rough. Maybe it was an off week though. Stir The Sauce isn’t lighting up the scoreboard, so SMM should be able to get back on track. But if they don’t? Uh-oh. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 17

 

BLITZKRIEG VS PIT HARADE (+12) - Fall Blitzkrieg was back in full effect in Week 1, putting up 37 points, but losing? That 45 points allowed doesn’t seem right, and the currently anemic Pit Harade offense should be the cure for ails them. PH is on their 3,251st QB since their inception it seems, as Brian O from Vaspian has taken over that duty. Their defense has been very good, and even scoring an average amount of points on offense would have them looking at a 2-0 record. These teams have met many times over the years, and BK always seems to have their number anyway from what I remember. BLITZKRIEG BY 18

 

BLITZKRIEG VS NOT SO STICKY (EVEN) - BK isn’t going to be playing 3 games in one day at least, but they get a doubleheader here. Getting Not So Sticky on the backend of a doubleheader is a double edged sword. On the one hand, NSS doesn’t usually play a fast paced game with tons of scoring, they’re a little bit more methodical, which means they’re not taking advantage of a more tired BK team, but on the other side of things, they have high football IQ, and that is always harder to deal with. NOT SO STICKY BY 2

 

NOT SO STICKY VS BRIDGET & QUIT IT (EVEN) - Bridget should already be on the QB Power Rankings. I get that she’s playing in D5 and the TSLQBPRC favors higher division QBs, but to come into the TSL as a brand new QB and just light up the competition (averaging 36 points a game) and not get acknowledged is just silly. What are they even doing over there? On the other hand, BQI has had a pretty easy schedule so far, only playing STS and MO. If Bridget and her cannon arm can beat the D5 All-Star team that is NSS, who will pose perhaps her greatest challenge defensively, that should solidify her (and the team, I guess) as bonafide studs in D5. 

 

D6

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

The Chargers 42, Intentional Clowning 22

Select 44, Puck Bunnies 16

Four Tuddies 26, Raw Milkers 25

Blue Ballers 46, Raw Milkers 31

The Chargers looked a bit unstoppable against Intentional Clowning, as they took over first place in D6. Not to be outdone, Select is right on their heels after an easy 44-16 win over the Puck Bunnies. The Four Tuds got their first win, taking a one point win over the Raw Milkers, who would then drop to 0-4 on the season with a loss to the Blue Ballers, who got back on track after a Week 1 loss. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

RAW MILKERS VS PUCK BUNNIES (+6) - Two crowd favorites with a combined record of 0-6 face off in what will give at least one of them their first win, which means they’re tying. Jokes aside, The PBs have struggled on both sides of the ball, which is to be expected given that they’re a brand new team with a lot of learning to do. The Milkers aren’t playing up to the standards they set for themselves a season ago, but this might be the game that helps them get over the hump. RAW MILKERS BY 12

 

FLYING BALLS VS THREE TUDDIES (+7) - Who the hell are the Flying Balls? No, seriously, if you’re reading this email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it., let’s chat. The league’s most mysterious team showed up Week 1, put up 54 points, and vanished. After a week off, they’re getting the 3Ts, who are currently the worst of the various Tuddies. This version struggles a bit on offense, which the Balls do not. FLYING BALLS BY 14

 

TMA VS BLUE BALLERS (+3) - Two of last season’s top D6 teams return to the fields for some good ol’ fashioned football. These teams can both score points, so it’ll be on whichever defense makes a play or two, and TMA has more than enough players with a knack for that. TMA BY 6

 

SELECT VS IRISH GIANTS (+3) - The Irish Giants have finally decided to play some football after taking the first two weeks of the season off to probably do some fun stuff. Their first test is a pretty dialed in Select team that’s been looking like a championship contender this season. The Giants had a very good last few weeks in the Spring, which kind of reminded everyone in the league what they can actually do on a football field. But getting a hot opponent after a lot of time off isn’t the best start for them. SELECT BY 8

 

THE CHARGERS VS FOUR TUDDIES (+7) - The Chargers continue to take D6 by storm, putting up yet another big offensive game, and they’re looking like legit contenders for the title. Four Tuddies did get their first win in franchise history last week, but they’re going from playing the bottom of the standings to the tippy top of them in a week’s span. They’re not ready for that. THE CHARGERS BY 17

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• WILL ANY OF THE REMAINING UNDEFEATED TEAMS STAY UNDEFEATED DURING THE SEASON? While I’d like to say no, because it's very hard to be “on” every single week and not have that week where half of your team can’t make it, or the weather is terrible, etc., there’s a very good chance that the winners of the PowerPuff Girls vs Two Tuddies and Legends vs Sticky Bandits games can pull it off. The Chargers have a really good chance to do so as well if they keep it up, as they managed to avoid TMA, Select, AND Sticky Laces on their schedule, making it arguably the ‘easiest’ in the division. 

 

 

 

• DO ANY TEAMS LOOK LIKE THIS YEAR’S WINNER OF THE “SHOW ME YOUR TDS AWARD FOR BEING IN THE WAY WRONG DIVISION? Nobody looks like that on the level that the award’s namesake did by this time last session. If you’re making me pick one, perhaps it’s the Freeballers in D1? They were QUITE good last season despite not winning any games in the regular season, but it took getting a really good QB to get them there, and I’m not sure they’ve properly replaced them. But I could be wrong there and it’s a recency bias thing. Maybe Cobblestone but I believe. The GirthQuakes probably would be better off getting some seasoning down in D4 maybe too. But the fact that this was pretty hard to answer tells you that the league has it right this time around. 

 

 

 

• IS THERE ANYONE THAT REALLY NEEDS A WIN ALREADY IN WEEK 3? I alluded to it earlier, but Sausage McMuffins really do. They haven’t played the toughest schedule at all, and last season they’d be 3-0, but to be 1-1-1 and give the showing they gave last week? If they lose this week, they’re really in trouble. 

 

 

 

• WHO’S THE CURRENT “MOST SHOCKING RECORD” AWARD WINNER THIS EARLY IN THE SEASON? This is easy. Practice Squad, and they know it. It’s one thing to be 0-2. Honestly, the Squad being 0-2 isn’t that unusual as they’re the poster child for “Go winless in the regular season, win the championship anyway”, but these two losses feel different for some reason. If they lose this week……

 

 

 

• WHY ARE PEOPLE BRINGING OUTSIDE ALCOHOL TO THE FIELDS? Despite what many may think, it isn’t “just to be jerks”. For whatever reason, the bar does love to upcharge the league and overprice drinks over the last few seasons. I’m not sure if that is on purpose to help “tone down” the drunken debauchery that the TSL has always given at the Rose Garden on Saturdays, or if it's just the price of business, but it feels more like the former. League vets will remember the “DINNER CLUB” days where the bar made the call to boot the players outside as opposed to spending lots of money at the bar because we can get a touch rowdy. Anyway, while it's extremely frowned upon to bring your outside alcohol to the fields (seriously, don’t do it.), it's more in protest by those who believe that the bar should want to take care of the league’s players, given our history and how much you spend there as a whole. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS BEFORE SATURDAY

 

 

• Here’s that football weather you were looking for: Buffalo is going to be 68 degrees with a little bit of wind. Perhaps your heatwave game days are over? 

 

 

 

• GAMES OF THE DAY: 

• 10:00 - D-Generation X, Y, and Z vs Buffalo Vice

• 11:00 - ILF vs Bullet Club

• 12:00 - The Malones vs Can’t Touch This

• 1:00 - Not So Sticky vs Bridget & Quit It

• 2:00 - Four Tuddies vs The Chargers

 

 

 

• It’s really cool to see a bunch of the TSL’s new teams performing so well. Same goes for most of the current division champs that moved up. 

 

 

 

• Again, do NOT bring outside alcohol to the fields. Just don’t do it. 

 

 

 

• I was informed that league icon Trish Esposito has moved away to a new state to start a new chapter in her life. The TSL wishes her well on her new adventure! 

 

 

 

• Remember that the TSL podcast is posted on Spotify, and if you don’t have Spotify you can listen at the bottom of the website. No word on if they’ll eventually add other mediums to listen yet. 

 

 

 

• If you want to be a guest on the podcast, you can always reach out to Jeff Krol, Joe K, Dorene, Tino, etc. If you don’t know who those people are, you can ask pretty much anyone at the fields or the bar to point one of them out to you. 

 

 

 

• If you want to stick around the fields and referee a game or two, the league is always looking for the next big thing in refereeing! Ask your ref of your game who you should talk to so they can point you towards Garrett. 

 

 

 

• To a few individuals in the league, the powers that be know what you’re doing, and they’re watching you. Cut it out. 

 

 

 

• I’m always torn on if the league should have a league wide bye week for Memorial Day/Labor Day weekends due to the high requests of teams being off and players missing. But then again, it always tends to make for a fun week of games. Enjoy yourselves this weekend! 

 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 1 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 15 August 2025 18:37

Published: Friday, 15 August 2025 18:37

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1277

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, after six long, unusually hot weeks, the TSL has returned to the Leonard T. Alba III fields at the Rose Garden as the Race For Social Co-Ed Immortality begins once again. The TSL Fall 2025 season is shaping up to be quite interesting, as 49 of the best social co-ed football teams in the world (Okay, 48 of them and Freeballers) gear up to compete for the six chances at immortality that the league has to offer. 

 

Now, if you’re new to the league, allow me to introduce myself. I’m the Godfather, the TSL’s resident article writing, prediction making machine. I used to play in the TSL back when it first started, before life whisked me away to Des Moines, Iowa where I still reside today in my super kool log cabin with my family. I kept writing this article as a way to stay connected to the league I love, and I worked with Topper, Rameer, and especially Lenny to keep the good times rolling. Nowadays I work with Jeff Krol a lot to get some information on games and teams, and I have several spies throughout the league that report to me as well. I’m always looking for new people to reach out to me and let me know about their teams, so please, shoot me an email at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. and let me know about the players on your squad and why YOU are the next TSL champion in waiting. 

 

There’s a LOT of interesting things to talk about this season already, both good and bad. The bad, of course, is that Topper’s Florida Tim Horton’s Empire is preventing him from putting in a team this fall. The other bad news is that the much beloved Breakfast Club is taking a break for this season. After that? It’s all good news. Or at least news. Like for instance: D1 has EIGHT teams again. After quite a few seasons with only 4-6 teams, D1 has expanded with the additions of the Mavericks (after back to back D2 titles, it was time), and Unit Ha Ha, which is a brand new squad of some familiar faces, most notably Amber Hay and Darrik Bloomfield, the latter of which has been #1 on “best player in the league’s history” on quite a few people’s lists over the years. If Can’t Touch This didn’t chicken out and stay down in D2, D1 would’ve been even more fun. Speaking of D2, it’s still a 6 team battle royal as Grey Hair Don’t Care makes their return to join CTT, The Malones, Scared Hitless, Jabronies, and D3 champs/D2 newcomers PWI to give us quite the interesting division that should be chock full of bangers every week. 

 

In fact, shout out to all of the Spring 2025 champions for being bad asses and EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM moved up to the next division. I already mentioned the Mavericks and PWI, but ILF is up to D3, The Power Puff Girls are in D4, and Balls Deep are in D5. This is the way it should be every season, but there’s usually a scaredy cat or two in there who petition Jeff about why they just simply “can’t” move up. BUT NOT THIS TIME. D3 is largely the same, consistent, competitive division it always is. PWI moved up, but ILF took their place. However instead of the usual 10 teams, it appears to have only 8 this time around as Let’s/Becca Gets Reccked merged with PWI on their D2 adventure and 716 stopped showing up in like Week 3 last season. D4 has a random number of teams with 7, but they’ll be a good 7. The Two Tuddies decided they like the pain of playing the Powerpuff Girls so much that they moved up to D4 with them, but most importantly Cobblestone’s prodigal son Garrett Beesing has returned to Darryl Carr QB Superstar (along with his Breakfast Club soulmate John “he’s probably already hurt” Langley) to recapture the old magic and lead Darryl to a championship. 

 

D5 sits at 8 teams, as Balls Deep joins the fray of recent D6 champions/title contenders in Not So Sticky, Blitzkrieg, Sausage McMuffins, and Pit Harade. Mo’ Chicken and Stir The Sauce are back from last season as well, with the only newcomers being “Bridget and Quit It”, which, according to reports, will have a female QB as the revolution Kelly Kane brought the TSL not too long ago continues to spark new franchises. And finally, D6 has TWELVE teams. Yes, TWELVE. How so you ask? Let me try to tell you. The Two Tuddies decided to split into two weaker teams and then add some others for fun, which resulted in Three Tuddies and Four Tuddies (but don't worry, the original TWO Tuddies are still here, and stronger than ever). The Chargers played in the wine tournament, decided they loved the vibe, and joined the TSL immediately. You gotta love that. Another example of the greatness that is this league. Once you play in it, you’re stuck. The Flying Balls are a brand new team I know nothing about so that’ll be exciting to see how they do. And lastly, the Puck Bunnies are led by one of the league’s top ladies in Maddie Norton, as she prepares to QB an all female team that has a nice mix of talent (TD Tori, for example) and a bunch of newbies that will have every single higher division GM salivating as the poaching is projected to start by 11:02am this Saturday. Girls, if you’re reading this, expect to be mansplained that “You know, you’re allowed to stay on the gender team AND play for a co-ed team too so you wouldn’t even have to leave them or ref four games!” by a bunch of overzealous dudes in the coming weeks. Make them buy you drinks at least before telling them no, buckets of Suncruisers can get expensive. 

 

That’s just scratching the surface of what’s new and different for the Fall 2025 season. As any TSL veteran will tell you, every single TSL session is its own living, breathing monster that has a life of its own, full of twists and turns and who knows what else. It has more ups and downs than field 3. The only thing to expect is the unexpected. 

 

And now we get into the part you’ve all been waiting for, the extremely accurate predictions! I’ll be giving you the current Vegas Odds for the championship for each division, before I get into this week’s games predictions. Let’s see where this season is headed. 

D1

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

Legends 3-1

Eyes Downtown 4-1

Frodo Swaggins 7-1

Sticky Bandits 8-1

Unit Ha Ha 8-1

What A Dump 8-1

Mavericks 20-1

Freeballers 25-1

The Legends are going for their league record tying 5th championship (Officially, the “Wet Bandits” won the Fall 2024 title, check the Champions tab on the website) and there’s no reason to think they won’t win it again. The TSL’s resident All-Star team, love them or hate them, are a close knit group of friends that are excited to play for each other and they want to win. They’re better with a chip on their shoulder though, so it’ll be interesting to see how this season goes for them. Eyes Downtown had a heck of a season after the roster had to get cobbled together last minute, and with another offseason of two-a-days in the hot summer, this team can’t be counted out to dethrone the Legends. Frodo Swaggins took a leap forward last season, which can only mean they should take another one this season, right? Adding two absolute stud females in Renee Lantz and Rylee Moser should help with that. Sticky Bandits find themselves in a weird spot where they have the talent and the brains to win the title, but with the retirements of Brandy Clarke and (at least part time) Dr. Christine “The Better” Krol, things will get harder. Katie Salisbury should help there and Sticky signed rising TSL star Jill Fittry to help replace them though, so maybe things won’t be that bad. There’s not much to Unit Ha Ha that I know about, but the talented names you can see on the roster already tell you that they’re going to be a force in the division, unless there are some growing pains that come with a new team. What A Dump had an “okay” first season, but Ben Stack proceeded to run back to Bobby and Eyes Downtown with his tail between his legs this offseason, so they replaced him with Andy Smigiera and got better anyway. I expect them to be much more competitive this season. The Mavericks come into D1 after avoiding it a season ago (word is they just wanted to beat The Malones one last time, with one unnamed Mavericks player stating “since The Malones will never make it to D1 anyway”). They have the talent and the know-how, and they have D1 caliber players, they just have to put it all together. As we learned last season, the second you underestimate the Mavericks is the second they’re going to beat you.  Lastly, we have the Freeballers, who looked very good last season with Jordan at QB, but he’s gone now and it doesn’t seem like there’s a D1 QB on the roster? Not sure what the plan is there, unless they’re getting Topper to throw for them at the last minute? Is Hogan waddling around somewhere? 

 

Prediction: Eyes Downtown knocks off the Legends, forcing them to play more seasons together.

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

STICKY BANDITS VS MAVERICKS (+13) - Not a bad way to kick off the season as the Mavericks get to come into D1 and take on a vulnerable Sticky Bandits team. There’s still a pretty decent learning curve going from D2 to D1 though, and we’ll see it here. STICKY BANDITS BY 16

 

LEGENDS VS UNIT HA HA (+11) - Welcome to the league, Unit Ha Ha. The schedule makers did them zero favors by giving them the Legends right off the bat. Even if they seem capable on paper, it’s still going to take a game or two to really shake the rust off and find a rhythm. That’s not how you want to go into a game against the Legends. LEGENDS BY 18

 

EYES DOWNTOWN VS FREEBALLERS (+20) - Eyes Downtown is looking better than ever and we don’t even know who the Freeballers QB is. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 17

 

FRODO SWAGGINS VS WHAT A DUMP (EVEN) - Frodo is a better team yet again, and What A Dump can only be better after losing Ben Stack. This one feels like a barnburner to get our season started correctly. WHAT A DUMP BY 1

D2

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

Can’t Touch This 3-1

The Malones 4-1

PWI 9-1

Scared Hitless 12-1

Grey Hair Don’t Care 15-1

Jabronies 15-1

Can’t Touch This was so good last season and it’s still shocking even six weeks later that they didn’t win D2. As far as I know the whole gang is back together again, and they’re on a mission to take the crown. The Malones are highly talented, everyone knows that. They have arguably the best girls in the league top to bottom. They’re all quick as a hiccup. But they’re soft mentally. If you get in their heads and they start arguing with each other, it’s a wrap for them. I’ve heard rumors that they went on a friendship retreat in the woods this offseason to improve communication though, and if they keep their heads on straight, this title is theirs. PWI shouldn’t be called PWI anymore. The long time PWIers that helped this team climb out of the doldrums since it started are mostly gone, and the decision to combine with Becca Gets Reccked to make the D2 roster better overall is an interesting one that could easily disrupt the locker room/team chemistry vibe that PWI has thrived on for its entire existence. But if it clicks? Look out. This team feels like they could have the widest array of potential outcomes this season. Scared Hitless and Jabronies are back and they’re largely the same teams as before, although SH might have a QB issue with Dylan apparently moving away? Not sure about those details. Grey Hair returns to pick up where they left off, rocking out in D2, and you can never overlook them. 

 

Prediction: Can’t Touch This over The Malones. Both go to D1 anyway. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS GREY HAIR DON’T CARE (+8) - CTT always rocks out in the first week of new seasons, now let’s add in the fact that they’re focused on winning the title more than ever. Yeah. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 14

 

THE MALONES VS JABRONIES (+10) - The Jabronies usually take the fall off I thought? Either way, they usually play The Malones very close, and while they COULD beat them, I’m not sure they actually will. THE MALONES BY 6

 

SCARED HITLESS VS JABRONIES (EVEN) - These teams had a hell of a few games last season against one another and I expect this to be no different. I’m giving Scared Hitless the slight edge since the Jabronies will be coming off a tough game just before this with no break in between. #analytics. SCARED HITLESS BY 10

 

D3

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

Wanderers 3-1

Bullet Club 5-1

Practice Squad 5-1

Cunning Stunts 7-1

Buffalo Vice 9-1

ILF 10-1

D-Generation XYZ 10-1

Girthquakes 15-1

The Wanderers come into the season with the same squad that made up last season’s dominant team. They’re once again the favorites to win the championship, but that means nothing to them as they’ve been favored seemingly every season they’re in the league, only to fall short each and every time. Bullet Club beat the Wanderers in last season’s playoffs in overtime, before falling short against PWI in the finals. They’ve added Aaron Balcerzak of “the tall guy Topper keeps overthrowing” fame and Sam Robins from the Freeballers to help the squad get over the hump. Practice Squad remains largely the same, looking to improve on last season’s semi-final loss to PWI. The Cunning Stunts had a tough (by their standards) first season in D3, but they’re simply too good to not be better this season. Buffalo Vice still holds one of the league’s top females in Caitlyn Mason to go along with the big arm of Andy Clark. There’s talent all over this roster, even if most of the team flies under the radar to the general public. And they like it that way. ILF makes the jump up from D4, and due to the “Any Given Saturday” theme of D3 where anyone can beat anyone else, there’s a decent chance they adapt to D3 quickly and win the whole thing in one try. Team Keller is looking to bounce back from an off year last spring, but time will tell if that’s an actual possibility or not. Lastly, the Girthquakes went through some growing pains last year, but getting more reps with Kieta at QB and figuring it all out as a unit can only lead to a nice improvement this season. 

 

Prediction: Practice Squad becomes the latest team to beat the Wanderers in the playoffs. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BULLET CLUB VS BUFFALO VICE (+3) - These two teams have traded wins back and forth since Vice moved up from D4 a few seasons ago. BC is a bit more talented on paper, which is why I give them the edge. BULLET CLUB BY 6

 

INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS VS GIRTHQUAKES (+7) - Not bad for ILF. Coming into the season to start D3 with arguably the “least best” team in the division (I don’t want to say worst) is a good way to work out any kinks they may have and get the season started on the right foot. Conversely, this is a great way for the GQs to really start things off right. INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS BY 13

 

PRACTICE SQUAD VS D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z (+8) - I still can’t fathom how DXYZ had such an off year last season, but it happens to the best of teams I guess. They’re going to have a better year overall this year, I can feel it. But Practice Squad HAS been rolling for a bit now here in D3, and they’re a true title contender. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 7

D4

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

PowerPuff Girls 3-1

Mike’s Detailing 5-1

Two Tuddies 5-1

Come From Behind 7-1

Puckett All-Stars 7-1

Ready To Retire 9-1

Cobblestone 9-1

D4 is about as close as you can get in terms of “who can win the title”. The PPG ran all over D5 last year, and that’s why they already have the best odds in D4. It’ll be interesting to see who can stop them on defense this year. Mike’s Detailing had its season derailed in the playoffs due to a lack of a QB which was just unfortunate, but they’re title contenders once again. The Two Tuddies jumped up from D5 where they also had a great season that was just overshadowed by how dominant the PPGs were. The Tuddies made some roster adjustments this year, so it’ll be interesting to see if the team chemistry remains the same. Come From Behind can never be counted out, and after a season of D4 play, they seem to have a better handle on what to expect this year. They’re going to have a better season for sure. If there’s one thing that matters the most in D4, it’s that Puckett has gotten their “All-Stars” back after a season of just being “Puckett”. Ready To Retire is a watered down version of Bird Watching in my Birkenstocks from last season, so I’m not quite sure what to expect from them, and Cobblestone brings up the rear, but the additions this season and a new commitment to winning can lead to some surprises this season for sure. 

 

Prediction: Powerpuff Girls beat Cobblestone in the finals. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

MIKE’S DETAILING VS PUCKETT ALL-STARS (+3) - Mike’s Detailing (tell ‘em The Godfather sent you for 7.16% off your detailing bill!) had it all last season before poor scheduling cost them a shot at the title. Had they not had the buzzsaw that is the PPGs coming into the division, they’d be the favorites. Meanwhile, Puckett is the same as always. Solid. Dependable. Talented. Winners. They can never be counted out, and they’re really good at showing teams who the hell they are. PUCKETT ALL-STARS BY 8

 

COME FROM BEHIND VS READY TO RETIRE (EVEN) - I have no idea what to expect from Ready to Retire. I have no idea if Paul is in Florida or not. These things matter. I’ll assume the ol’ gunslinger is in Buffalo this week. COME FROM BEHIND BY 12

TWO TUDDIES VS COBBLESTONE (+8) - A semi new look Tud Buds vs a semi new look Cobblestone? Should be interesting for sure. While I’d love to see Cobblestone just come out and kill it, I think there will be a few growing pains there while the Tuddies roster changes should go a bit more smoothly. TWO TUDDIES BY 13

D5

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

Blitzkrieg 4-1

Sausage McMuffins 4-1

Not So Sticky 4-1

Balls Deep 7-1

Pit Harade 10-1

Bridget & Quit It 10-1

Mo’ Chicken 15-1

D5 finds themselves at a whopping 7 teams this season, which makes things a little interesting at the top. Blitzkrieg, the McMuffins, and Not So Sticky all beat up on each other last season, and now they’re co-co-favorites for the title. Balls Deep moves up to D5 after winning D6 last season, and they should slot right into the mix from the get go. If STS, Pit Harade and Mo’ Chicken improve, along with B-QUIT being competitive, D5 is anyone’s for the taking. There’s not a lot of new things going on here, other than B-QUIT having a female QB who, with the tutelage of Bobby McConnell running through her veins, could be very interesting. I’ll be keeping my eye on it for sure. 

 

Prediction: For funsies: Blitzkrieg over Sausage McMuffins. Tell me if you’ve heard that before. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BLITZKRIEG VS BALLS DEEP (+6) - Is there a lot separating Balls Deep and BK? No, probably not. BK had a nice run in their first D5 season, and a play or two here and there could’ve made it a bit better honestly. Balls Deep extinguished their playoff demons tenfold in last season’s run to the title, and the team really hasn’t played better than they are now in their history. I think they’re going to turn some heads this season. BALLS DEEP BY 10

 

SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS VS MO’ CHICKEN (+12) - The McMuffins had a nice start to the season last year before things kind of fell apart, but the experience gained from it will surely help them this year. Mo’ Chicken had a lot of things go wrong last season, but there’s a roadmap to them being good over time. I’m not quite sure they’re there yet. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 17

 

STIR THE SAUCE VS BRIDGET & QUIT IT (EVEN) - STS didn’t have the best season last time around but injuries played a role in that. I’d expect them to be a bit better this time around, but only time will tell. B-QUIT is a complete unknown currently, so let’s go with Wrestler Dan. STIR THE SAUCE BY 3

D6

 

CHAMPIONSHIP ODDS

 

TMA 3-1

Blue Ballers 5-1

Irish Giants 7-1

Sticky Laces 7-1

Raw Milkers 9-1

Select 11-1

Puck Bunnies 11-1

Intentional Clowning 13-1

Three Tuddies 15-1

Four Tuddies 15-1

The Chargers 20-1

Flying Balls 20-1

D6 is a ridiculously fun mess of 12 teams. TMA returns from a nearly perfect season that went off the rails in the title game, and the Blue Ballers are right on their heels after a great season themselves. The Irish Giants did nothing last season for 7 weeks and then started to look like world beaters until they didn’t. Sticky Laces? More like Sticky Letdowns after last season’s hype train died off as quickly as it started. Without pesky things like “weddings” in the way, hopefully they’ll be a bit more focused this time around. The Raw Milkers were plucky underdogs last year, and this season feels a bit more like they’ll be able to disrupt the top of the standings. Select and Intentional Clowning return from last season as well, hoping to improve on some “not great” seasons in the spring. As for the newbies, I don’t know which version of these Tuddies have Danwin (if any) so I’m not going to pick one over the other until I can see some results. The Chargers have some good talent based on my wine tournament scout’s information and they could probably turn some heads. Not sure what to make of the Flying Balls until they play a game or two. And then we have the Puck Bunnies, the all female team that’s going to be QUITE fun to monitor this season. Will Maddie lead the ladies to the promised land? One can only hope so. 

 

Prediction: TMA beats the Sticky Laces in the finals, everyone cheers, Brent wins D6 Male Athlete of the year at the awards banquet. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BLUE BALLERS VS FLYING BALLS (+8) - Lots and lots of balls here. With no idea what the Flying Balls bring to the table, along with knowing that the Blue Ballers were a wagon at times last season, it has the makings of a Blue Ballers victory. BLUE BALLERS BY 8

 

STICKY LACES VS PUCK BUNNIES (EVEN) - The talent on the side of the Puck Bunnies is undeniable, at least for some of the names you’ve heard of before. If they can get the ball to their play makers, there’s a very good chance the Laces won’t be able to keep up. PUCK BUNNIES BY 9

 

INTENTIONAL CLOWNING VS THREE TUDDIES (+3) - Intentional Clowning kept the same team name for the first time in multiple seasons, so that’s something. Three Tudz is a team that I’ll be interested to see how they work and who they have. THREE TUDDIES BY 2

 

INTENTIONAL CLOWNING VS STICKY LACES (EVEN) - Both teams have double headers this week, although the Laces get a small break in between. That should give them the advantage needed to bring the W home. STICKY LACES BY 8

 

RAW MILKERS VS THE CHARGERS (+7) - The Raw Milkers were up and down, but the underlying numbers last year showed they should have been better than they were last year. Getting The Chargers to start the season is a nice way to begin the session, as they’re about as new as a team can be. There’s some talent there though, and if they have a QB who can sling it, they may make waves in D6. RAW MILKERS BY 3

 

TMA VS FOUR TUDDIES (+7) - Even with Four Tuddies able to have the “know how” in how to win games, they’re going up against bonafide studs in TMA. With TMA on the “something to prove” tour, it’s not going to be a great day for the 4th Tud Buds. TMA BY 13

 

RAW MILKERS VS SELECT (+3) -  Select had an up and down season last year as they kept working to round into form, and while there was some improvement, it wasn’t enough to truly be a title contender. They find themselves in a similar situation as the Raw Milkers, improving and finding themselves JUST on the outside of the title picture. I don’t think they’re there just yet. RAW MILKERS BY 7

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• What division looks to be the most competitive this year? While D3 looks to be its usual competitive self, I think that D5 is the division that seems the most closely packed in terms of talent. 

 

 

 

• How on Earth will the D6 playoffs work? Good question. I’m assuming that the Top 4 teams will get a bye, with 5v12, 6v11, 7v10, 8v9 earlier in the day on Playoff Saturday, and then the Top 4 seeds play the winners after that. That would get us down to 4 teams remaining for Championship Saturday. How exciting! 

 

 

 

• How do you feel about teams who revamp their roster after winning a championship and/or when they moving up a division? I’m assuming this question has to do with the Two Tuddies and PWI making some big changes to their rosters. PWI cut a lot of players that have been around for a bit as they go up to D2, adding a lot of Let’s Get Reccked players. Two Tuddies, moving up to D4, also made some changes. On the one hand, perhaps there are players on the team that might not be able to perform well in a higher division, and at some point you have to make hard decisions, so I understand the why there. However at some point you have to wonder if adding too many new names can ruin the vibe you’ve built over a few other seasons and the team loses its identity. It’s never easy cutting friends, especially if it comes at a cost you didn’t expect. It’ll be interesting to see how those teams perform this year. 

 

 

 

• What team has the most to prove this season? At first I considered TMA for this spot, because they were just so dominant all season and just missed out on a championship. But after some thinking, I’m going to go with Can’t Touch This. They were simply awesome last season, and they have all of the pieces in place by having a top QB, top guys, and one of the best groups of girls (and still the most underrated) in the league. It isn’t “Championship or Bust” for them, but it should be. 

 

 

 

• WHERE IS BREAKFAST CLUB???? The absolute biggest tragedy of the season is the lack of Breakfast Club this season. While it will be back in full force next spring, the league took a season off mainly because recruiting for BC can be exhausting, and after Jeff Krol had a procedure done this offseason, he didn’t have the time nor the ability to hit the recruiting trail and do whatever he needs to do to make sure Breakfast Club works. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, so Spring 2026 BC is going to be awesome, I can feel it. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• For those that don’t know, the Rose Garden tore down the house that used to be right next door. That should help alleviate some of the past parking issues. 

 

 

 

• According to my Weather Channel app, Buffalo is looking at a 90 degree day on Saturday. Stay hydrated! 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Puck Bunnies vs Sticky Laces

• 11:00 - Legends vs Unit Ha Ha

• 12:00 - Scared Hitless vs Jabronies

• 1:00 - D-Generation X, Y, and Z vs Practice Squad

• 2:00 - Frodo Swaggins vs What A Dump

 

 

 

• This is your casual reminder to not be a jerk to your referees, or else you will be asked to leave the fields. 

 

 

 

• Three teams that wouldn’t surprise me if they ended up as champions, even if it feels less than plausible: Puckett All-Stars, Frodo Swaggins, Balls Deep 

 

 

 

• Can we just have a “friendly” Powerpuff Girls vs Cunning Stunts game just for the hell of it? Who would win? 

 

 

 

• As always, please make sure that you clean up your trash and don’t leave the fields looking like a complete mess! 

 

 

 

• The website was updated with all of the champions from the past, it’s pretty cool to see that! It also has photos of all of the reigning champions, including the Indoor champs and the newly crowned wine tournament champions! 

 

 

 

• Please don’t bring outside alcohol to the fields, doing so could possibly get you suspended from the league. As Jeff has said before: “Anyone doing anything that could jeopardize the league’s relationship with the bar/fields will be dealt with swiftly.”

 

 

 

• Remember the league will have its usual articles and podcast done every week, so you can keep up with TSL news throughout the work week before the fun begins on Saturday! If you’d like to be a guest on the podcast, reach out to Jeff, Joe K, Dorene, Cookie, Elmo, or B’s brother immediately! 

 

 

We’re back, baby. The Race For Social Co-Ed Immortality begins once again! Good luck to all who celebrate! 

 

-GF OUT

WEEK 2 THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 22 August 2025 12:33

Published: Friday, 22 August 2025 12:33

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1478

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, we’re off and running towards immortality! The TSL Fall 2025 season officially began last weekend on fields that can only be described as the way Topper likes it: dry and hard. We’ve already seen quite a few surprises, but I want to be very clear: the results of Week 1 RARELY follow suit by the time Championship Saturday rolls around. 

 

While the elements last week certainly played a small part (The “Scorched Earth” weather was quite the contrast from our average Spring 2025 Saturday), let me remind all of you (or allow me to give the newbies some knowledge) that we have very good teams that still had to shake the rust off, or were missing some players (because it’s early August and people still have summer vacations and/or weddings to attend), or they were assimilating brand new players to an existing squad, or they were brand new to begin with! 

 

It all adds up to the same result it does every season: You are NOT as good or as bad as you looked last week. So whether you were singing in the shower and feeling yourself Sunday morning or telling yourself “Man, this is how Show Me Your TDs must’ve felt.”, chances are you need to dial it in a little bit. Don’t get me wrong. SOME of the results from Week 1 will hold serve throughout the season and stay accurate. The question, as always, are which ones? Let’s dive in to the current trends: 

 

GOOD NOT BAD

 

 

• Sticky Bandits shake off a rough Spring, win 52-8

• Malones and CTT start on their probably championship collision course, win easily

• ILF on top of D3, D-Generation X, Y, and Z already off to a better start than last season

• Two Tuddies make roster moves, find themselves planted at the top of D4 already

• Puckett adds the “All-Stars” back to name, dunks on Mike’s Detailing

• Bridget already a Top 10 QB in the league, despite what half assed Power Rankings article says.

• Balls Deep wins first D5 game

• TMA whoops that ass, picks up where they left off

• Intentional Clowning doesn’t change name, but changes on field results going 2-0

• Flying Balls put up 54 points in debut, make Blue Ballers yesterday’s news

• The Chargers put up 49 points in impressive debut

 

 

NOT GOOD NOT BAD

 

 

• Sticky Laces remember how to win football games, promptly lose an hour later

• Jabronies get smacked, then put Scared Hitless in their place yet again

• Puck Bunnies lose by 7, get a pass because they’re already league darlings

 

 

BAD NOT GOOD

 

 

• Mavericks, Freeballers, Unit Ha Ha help D1 have eight teams, proceed to go 0-3, losing by an average score of 51-12

• Bullet Club and Practice Squad get hyped as preseason championship contenders, get smoked by opponents. 

• Cobblestone fields full roster from 2011, gets beaten like Spring 2025

• Blue Ballers get beaten by this year’s version of the Blue Ballers

• Three Tuddies proven to be not as good at football as Two Tuddies.

• Four Tuddies proven to be not as good at football as Three Tuddies, league wonders if this was the right team to “franchise” out.

• Raw Milkers en route to proving last season was a fluke, start off 0-2 as the first ever “12th Place Team” in TSL history

• Breakfast Club missed by all, Mimosa sales down 450% at the bar

 

But of course, these are just the opening week trends and come October, most of these won’t end up as your team’s narrative. Will your team be the one that keeps the train chugging along? Will your team be the one that changes the “not so great” trend it started off with? Only time will tell. 

 

D1

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Sticky Bandits 52, Mavericks 8

Legends 52, Unit Ha Ha 14

Eyes Downtown 49, Freeballers 14

What A Dump 28, Frodo Swaggins 27

 

Not exactly encouraging results for the new teams in the division, as the favorites all win big to get things rolling. In other news, What A Dump and Frodo played one of the best games of Week 1, with WAD earning a 1 point win. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

EYES DOWNTOWN VS STICKY BANDITS (+7) - Sticky Nation had just about everything go right for them last weekend, while Eyes Downtown just played a normal ED game. The Bandits can very easily prove that they’re back with a victory here, but until they do that, ED will still feel like they’re on a slightly higher level. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 6

 

MAVERICKS VS UNIT HA HA (+2) - The Mavs find themselves as favorites in a game a week after getting a “warm welcome” to D1, mainly because HAHA got the same treatment. I don’t know much about the Big Units just yet, other than they have former kind of good D1 QB Matt Glowacki and they trot out one of the top females in the league in Amber. The Mavs have played together longer and that should give them the edge after they shake last week off. MAVERICKS BY 8

 

WHAT A DUMP VS FRODO SWAGGINS (EVEN) - There’s nothing quite like a rematch the week after a hard fought game, and that’s what we have here as WAD and Frodo run it back. It’s hard to beat a team multiple times in a season, so Frodo gets their win back I think. FRODO SWAGGINS BY 3

 

LEGENDS vs WHAT A DUMP (+8) - WAD still hasn’t done anything in the league that suggests they should be candidates to dethrone the Legends, right? I’m not saying it isn’t possible for them to pull this off, but they’re still fine tuning things while the Legends routinely win these games on autopilot. LEGENDS BY 14

D2

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Can’t Touch This 40, Grey Hair - Don’t Care 29

The Malones 38, Jabronies 12

Jabronies 38, Scared Hitless 23

New season, same results for D2. CTT and The Malones win rather easily while the Jabronies continue to own Scared Hitless. Grey Hair did put up a fight against CTT, that shouldn’t go unnoticed. GHDC thrives in this underdog role, so be ready for them to pull an upset or two this year. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

CAN’T TOUCH THIS VS THE MALONES (EVEN) - Ladies and Gents, here is your main event of the afternoon! These two teams have already given us some good moments and intense games, and I can’t imagine that this will be any different. Both teams are hungry for the D2 title, and the path to Immortality is through each other. CTT has bested The Malones more recently, but I think maybe this time The Malones get one back. THE MALONES BY 2

 

PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED* VS JABRONIES (EVEN) - This isn’t your father’s PWI. The lovable roster that worked their way up the divisions over the last few years finds themselves missing a lot of the familiar faces that got them to D2 in the first place, as the pressures to produce in the higher divisions caused PWI to add a bunch of players from LGR as there was a roster merge in the offseason. They kept the PWI name because “Let’s Pass Out While Getting Reccked While Intoxicated” was too long of a team name, thank goodness. It’ll be interesting to see how this version of PWI stacks up, but I think it’ll take them a week or two to get acclimated to each other. Meanwhile, the Jabronies already have two games under their belts, giving them the advantage. JABRONIES BY 10

 

PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED* VS SCARED HITLESS (+3)  If the Jabronies are even, Scared Hitless has to be slightly the underdog, as the Jabronies own them. Whatever kinks LPOWGRWI had to work out in the last game are more than likely worked out, and they’ll be arguably better in this game despite the doubleheader. PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED* BY 8

 

GREY HAIR DON’T CARE VS SCARED HITLESS (EVEN) - I do think we’re in for a treat with this game though. Two evenly matched teams that kind of know each other pretty well? That’s usually a recipe for fun. I was strongly considering GHDC for this one, but there’s simply no way that SH goes 0-3 to start the year, right? RIGHT? SCARED HITLESS BY 9

D3

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Buffalo Vice 34, Bullet Club 14

Interdimensional Lightning Falcons 36, GirthQuakes 13

D-Generation X, Y, and Z 33, Practice Squad 16

 

A very un-D3 like slate of D3 games last week, as none of the games were particularly close at all. Buffalo Vice had a field day against Bullet Club, walking to an easy victory, ILF took the perfect “first D3 opponent” behind the woodshed, and Team Keller had little to no trouble with the Squad. Of all of the things that won’t “Stay the same” during the season, D3 having all non-close games is at the top of the list. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

BULLET CLUB VS GIRTHQUAKES (+8) - Bullet Club found themselves on the receiving end of a defensive clinic last week, throwing four interceptions and forcing none of their own against Buffalo Vice, uncharacteristic of the team that made their run to the finals last Spring. The Girthquakes got beat up on by the D4 champs, who trotted out their backup QB as well. The GQs are a good squad, even if the results don’t show it. Playing QB is hard, and for Matt Kieta to attempt to learn the position while playing in D3/D4 is actually impressive. However, he’s still prone to mistakes because of it. I bet the GQs win 3 games this season. This won’t be one of them. BULLET CLUB BY 10

 

WANDERERS VS INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS (+13) - Well ILF, last week was fun. This week is going to be the opposite. Arguably going from their easiest game to the most difficult game on the schedule, ILF gets the Wanderers in their first action of the season. We haven’t seen the Wanderers since their overtime playoff loss to Bullet Club, coming up empty yet again for the championship. They’ve got to have a chip on their shoulder. Despite their 47 minor league championships, they’ve yet to claim Social Co-Ed Immortality, even with being on the cusp of it multiple times. This year might be the year, right? Either way, it sucks to be ILF, because the Wanderers are going to be focused as hell in this one. WANDERERS BY 12

 

BUFFALO VICE VS PRACTICE SQUAD (EVEN) - Despite the results of last week, this is a marquee matchup between two really good, and evenly matched, teams. The Squad had a hiccup a week ago, and when that happens, they tend to come back stronger than ever the next week. Vice played a near perfect game last weekend, so you have to expect some regression to the mean. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2

 

CUNNING STUNTS VS D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z (+3) - The Stunts make their return to the TSL after taking Week 1 off, looking to get started on the right foot. The roster is a little different but remains largely the same, which means DXYZ will have their hands full. However, it looks as though whatever ailed the Kellers last season has been fixed, and a win here would solidify last season was a fluke. D-GENERATION X, Y, AND Z BY 3

 

D4

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Puckett All-Stars 36, Mike’s Detailing 21

Ready To Retire 36, Come From Behind 20

Two Tuddies 46, Cobblestone 14

Puckett gets off to a good start this season, knocking off Mike’s Detailing rather easily. Ready To Retire looks like there’s still a little magic left in those old knees, putting up 36 points against CFB. Lastly in D4, the Two Tuddies announced their arrival in the division by smacking around Cobblestone, much to everyone’s chagrin. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS READY TO RETIRE (+7) - Mommy’s home. The PPGs are the defending D5 champs, and they’re ready to add “D4 champs” to their resumes as well. They were too good for their division last year, and there’s already some rumblings that that may be the case for D4 as well. Until I see someone stop them, I’ll have to agree. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 16

 

POWERPUFF GIRLS VS COBBLESTONE (+14) - Cobblestone and Darryl Carr QB Superstar got the band back together, and that’s going to be a lovely story once they get on the same page. Last week wasn’t exactly that, and now they get their toughest game of the season already as they try to get on the same page. In a perfect world where Lenny would script the games, Cobblestone goes down early, only to mount a comeback and win on the last play. Sadly, this world isn’t perfect. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 12

 

TWO TUDDIES VS MIKE’S DETAILING (+3) - It’s hard not to favor the New Look Tud Buds (okay, they didn’t go full PWI, but they did make a couple of changes) after an impressive D4 debut, coupled with MD’s less than stellar opening game. Even if MD plays better, and they will, I’m not sure there’s a more dialed in team than the Two Tuddies right now. TWO TUDDIES BY 1

 

COME FROM BEHIND VS COBBLESTONE (+6) - Do NOT adjust your TV sets. This is NOT 2017. Two of the TSL’s oldest (literally and figuratively) franchises meet up for a rendezvous to see who won’t start out the season 0-2. This feels like we’re headed for an old school shootout, and I’m excited to see who wins. COME FROM BEHIND BY 2

D5

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Balls Deep 45, Blitzkrieg 37

Sausage McMuffins 26, Mo’ Chicken 14

Not So Sticky 21, Pit Harade 10

Bridget & Quit It 32, Stir The Sauce 20

D5 seemed like such an unknown heading into the season, but after one week, it looks like we may have a close knit division on our hands. Granted, you can’t trust Week 1, but there’s reason to believe it as 5 of these teams have played many close games over the years coming up from D6, Stir The Sauce has been around for a while now, Mo Chicken is improving, and Bridget (according to eyewitnesses) can SLING IT. Where oh where is Kelly Kane and GUCCI when you need them? Anyway, Balls Deep took out Fall Blitzkrieg in a hell of a battle, while the McMuffins calmly won over MO. NSS took a victory over a newer look Pit Harade, and Bridget made Wrestler Dan tap out, beating STS. 

 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

STIR THE SAUCE VS PIT HARADE (+6) - These two teams didn’t have the best of seasons in the spring, nor did they win in Week 1. Both TSL franchises have had some significant roster turnover as of late, and while there are still some familiar TSL celebrities involved (Wrestler Dan, Joe K, The Most Honorable Prophet Dave Walter, etc.) there’s a lot of newer people to the league as well. Both teams are looking to get on track, only one can. STIR THE SAUCE BY 3

 

BALLS DEEP VS SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS (EVEN) - Another rivalry renewed. Balls Deep gets to play Sausage McMuffins after a season off, but this isn’t the same Balls Deep that SMM left behind. They exude confidence, and have had all of their ladies take a massive step forward on both sides of the ball. SMM are no slouches by any means, but the general feeling around the league is that Balls Deep has surpassed them in terms of talent. This should be interesting. BALLS DEEP BY 8

 

SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS VS MO’ CHICKEN (+10) - On the other hand for the McMuffins, they still have a talented team that knows how to play the game, which gives them a distinct advantage over Mo’ Chicken, who is dealing with a little bit of roster turnover alongside learning how to play the TSL game. Once it clicks for them, look out. SAUSAGE MCMUFFINS BY 16

 

BRIDGET & QUIT IT VS MO’ CHICKEN (+8) - QB Bridget wants to be great, by all reports. That’s all I need to know after hearing about her arm cannon as she diced up Stir The Sauce last week. MO will need a serious gameplan if they want to stop BQUIT, and nothing they’ve done YET has suggested that they can do that. Remember, it takes time. BRIDGET & QUIT IT BY 16

 

D6

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

Flying Balls 54, Blue Ballers 44

Sticky Laces 28, Puck Bunnies 21

Intentional Clowning 34, Three Tuddies 15

Intentional Clowning 30, Sticky Laces 28

The Chargers 49, Raw Milkers 35

TMA 39, Four Tuddies 6

Select 28, Raw Milkers 14

 

Welcome to the league Flying Balls! The FBs put up 54 on the Blue Ballers, who put up 44 of their own, and announced themselves to the rest of the division. This 12 team division is going to be wild. Sticky Laces got off to a much better start this season than last, putting the Puck Bunnies down quietly, before losing a close one to Intentional Clowning. IC went 2-0 on the day after also beating up on the Three Tuddies, not to be confused with the Four Tuddies, who got a mudhole stomped in them by TMA. But wait, there’s more. The Chargers (not exactly the model NFL franchise to base yourself off of, by the way) put up 49 points en route to a Week 1 victory over the Raw Milkers, who let me down twice after losing again later on, this time to Select. All of this fun in D6, and that’s without the Irish Giants, who SHOULD be one of the better teams in the division, yet to play a game. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

THE CHARGERS VS INTENTIONAL CLOWNING (EVEN) - An early season big time game? Sure is. The Clowns brushed off whatever last season was (it felt uncharacteristic of them) and reestablished themselves as contenders while The Chargers just simply established themselves as contenders as well. At this point though, all teams not named “Tuddies” look to be contenders in D6 it seems. I’d love to know more about both of these teams (email me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. please!) so I can give proper shoutouts to them. This one should be fun, let's go with the new guys. THE CHARGERS BY 4

 

SELECT VS PUCK BUNNIES (+8) - The Puck Bunnies had a solid start as our all women’s team may have lost, but they’re winning over the hearts of the league. They’re having fun and they’re only going to get better as the season goes on. Select started out the season on the right side of the scoreboard, beating up on the Raw Milkers. The key to beating a gender team (the PBs still qualify as that even without any jerk boys playing) is to match them with 8 point TDs of your own, but Select has enough TSL Vets on the roster that they’ll know how to not only defend against the PBs but they’ll be able to exploit the PB Defense as there are girls learning how to play positions they’re not used to. SELECT BY 8

 

RAW MILKERS VS FOUR TUDDIES (+7) - Whatever the Raw Milkers did last week, they need to just move on from it. They’ve shown they’re a much better team than that, and now they get a brand new-ish Four Tuddies team that struggled hard a week ago. It could be the perfect fix for what ails them. RAW MILKERS BY 8

 

BLUE BALLERS VS RAW MILKERS (+10) - The Blue Ballers got kind of surprised by the Flying Balls last weekend, but they still put up 44 points, which was more than any other team except The Chargers. I’m not sure if the BBs took the brand new opponent lightly or whatever happened, but I feel like it was a learning experience for them and you’ll see them a bit more dialed in this week. The Milkers should beat the Four Tuds earlier on, but 1-3 after two weeks looks like their reality. BLUE BALLERS BY 18

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• WILL THE NEW LOOK PWI* ACTUALLY BE ABLE TO COMPETE WITH CTT AND THE MALONES? In a word, yes. The players they added from LGR aren’t just geeks off the street, they know how to play the game. Plus have we learned yet to never count out a Buddy Lee quarterbacked team? 

 

 

 

• IS D1 GOING TO STAY TOP HEAVY AND JUST CRUSH THE LOWER TEAMS EVERY WEEK? In a word, no. There’s veteran talent all over the place on the Mavs, HaHa, and even the Freeballers. My concern for the Freeballers is that they don’t have a D1 QB yet again after Jordan had to leave to lead the Mavs. With him under center last season, the Freeballers might’ve lost a lot of games, but they were in most of the games, and of course had a good playoffs with the upset over Frodo. Now they lose that, but that’s also why I think the Mavs will be just fine. The back to back D2 champs didn’t have a great Week 1, but if Jordan played that well last season with the Freeballers, a team he had to get used to, imagine how he should do with the Mavs, a team he knows inside and out. The Mavs overall are arguably more talented top to bottom than the Freeballers as well, so expect them to right the ship a bit. Unit Ha Ha has the talent, just look at the roster. It’s only a matter of time before they figure it all out. 

 

 

 

• WHAT RESULT FROM WEEK 1 DO YOU THINK IS MOST LIKELY TO BE A THEME FOR THE ENTIRE SEASON? D-Generation X, Y, and Z will remain a D3 title contender and stay near the top of the division all year. And for one “bad’ one, I’m SURE the mimosa sales at the bar will increase back up to normal levels, Breakfast Club or not. 

 

 

 

• RIGHT NOW WE HAVE THREE CHAMPIONS SITTING AT THE TOP OF THEIR NEW DIVISIONS IN ILF, TWO TUDDIES, AND BALLS DEEP. HOW WOULD YOU RANK THEM RIGHT NOW FROM MOST TO LEAST LIKELY TO STAY THERE? Good one. I think that Balls Deep has the best chance to stay atop the D5 standings for the entire season. They’re just playing so well. The Two Tuddies aren’t far behind, as they’re so locked in, but they have their bugaboos coming for them in the PowerPuff Girls. ILF comes in last for this exercise, but that’s mostly because they’re in the division that’s the definition of “Any Given Saturday”, and the range of their final record is much greater. You could tell me they went 8-0 and I wouldn’t be completely surprised, and you could tell me they ended up 1-7 and I wouldn’t be surprised either. I think we’ll see them at 3-5 when it’s all said and done, but then they’ll win a playoff game. 

 

 

 

• EVEN THOUGH IT’S EARLY, DOES ANYONE ‘NEED’ A WIN THIS WEEK? If you ignore the fact that all of the teams make the playoffs, so nobody ever “needs” a win technically, just for vibes for the rest of the season, I’d say the Raw Milkers need a win more than anyone this week. If they lose both games this week, and start out 0-4 (which they might have done last season?), that’s just a rough record to try to overcome in the 12 team division, and they more than likely won’t earn one of the four byes in D6. 

 

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR SATURDAY

 

 

• I’m in town for a wedding this weekend, and I expected the worst in terms of heat after the reports I got from my spies last week. But the weather has been very cool the last couple of days, especially in the morning, and it feels a lot like, well, football weather. This Saturday looks to be a solid 80 degrees, which is usually perfect weather. 

 

 

 

• And yes, there’s a chance I’ll be making my appearance at the fields, especially if I can get Topper to come. No, you won’t know who I am, but it’s always fun to watch people guess and to overhear the conversations about it at the bar/on the fields. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day: 

• 10:00 - Sticky Bandits vs Eyes Downtown

• 11:00 - The Malones vs Can’t Touch This

• 12:00 - Jabronies vs PWI*

• 1:00 - Frodo Swaggins vs What A Dump, Part 2

• 2:00 - Come From Behind vs Cobblestone (The Corona Bowl)

 

 

 

• It’s kind of neat that despite having multiple divisions of different sizes, every single division has exactly 4 games this week. 

 

 

 

• I was glad to see the TSL podcast was back for another season, if you want to listen it’s on Spotify or on the website at the bottom. I didn’t get to hear all of it, but there’s always some good banter about the league on there. 

 

 

 

• Please continue to respect the refs, and clean up your garbage on the fields. It’s just the right thing to do. 

 

 

 

• I’m still pretty excited about the TSL’s newest teams: Flying Balls, Bridget & Quit It, and The Chargers all won their games last week, and they did so convincingly. I HOPE this narrative is one that sticks around all season. 

 

 

 

• I heard that a couple of teams bailed on the TSL during the week before Week 1. There’s some crappy things to do to people in this league but to make others think they have a team to play on and then pull the rug out from under them at the last minute like that is some next level lame. Be better. 

 

 

 

• Can someone ask B’s Brother for his predictions on who will win the championships this season and email them to me? Thank you. 

 

 

 

• I keep hearing there’s a good chunk of people in the league that don’t know about the Facebook, or the website, or the podcast, or the articles, etc. These things tend to make our league stand out from the lesser leagues, so be a good leaguemate and let everyone know! 

 

 

-GF OUT

CHAMPIONSHIP THOUGHTS, PICKS AND STUFF

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Category: The Godfather's Picks

Created: Friday, 27 June 2025 18:22

Published: Friday, 27 June 2025 18:22

Written by Jeff Krol

Hits: 1491

Ladies and Gentlemen of the TSL Universe, the time has come. The teams have made it to the final stretch as the Race For Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality nears the finish line. Every season of the TSL is its own story, with its own twists and turns, and after the smoke cleared from Playoff Saturday last weekend, 26 of the TSL’s 54 teams remain as they vie for the official title of “Best In The World” in the form of 7 championships (6 Divisions, 1 Breakfast Club). 

Playoff Saturday was an absolute doozy, and it gave us a little bit of everything. We saw one team get their first non-forfeit win (Freeballers) that eased the pain of a rough regular season. We saw a thrilling overtime game that saw the Irish Giants continue their current hot streak, taking out the Raw Milkers in the process. We had shutouts (Two Tuddies 43-0 win over Mo’ Chicken), blowouts (Powerpuff Girls winning 52-12 over Pit Harade), and 1 point victories (Not So Sticky 21-20 over Jake From State Farm)....and that was just in D5! We had teams that usually blow it early on in the playoffs quell those demons (Balls Deep winning 44-16 over Select) and teams that we’re used to seeing play on Championship Saturday go home early (Cunning Stunts, 39-37 losers to Bullet Club). 

 

We had lower seeded teams win 7 of the 20 games played, with #5, #6, #9, and #10 seeds getting victories. All of the #1 and #2 seeds survived, although TMA and Bird Watching In My Birkenstocks had to work hard to stay alive. Now you’re thinking to yourself “Wait, BWB played Cobblestone, how on Earth did they have to work hard to survive?”. That’s because in one of the biggest surprises of Playoff Saturday, Cobblestone showed up. They only had 5 people, but they nearly pulled off the upset anyway, only losing 44-37. There’s still some absolute magic in the arm of Darryl Carr, QB Superstar. He’s basically a young Paul LoVullo, who also had to remind the young upstarts of Mike’s Detailing just who is the boss, and sent the D4 contenders home with quite the lesson, a 38-6 loss that will sting them throughout the offseason. 

 

The point is that, as usual, the Spring 2025 TSL Playoffs have already given us so much excitement, and there’s a whole second act coming this Saturday, June 28th, in the Year of Our Lord 2025 that can only give us even MORE ridiculous fun and excitement. 

 

The question becomes, exactly WHO will walk off the Leonard T. Alba III Fields At The Rose Garden as world champions? WHO will achieve immortality? That’s what I’m here to tell you. And as always, I’ve brought along some help for the Championship Saturday article. I’ve never found it to be fair that the TSLQBPRC is a group of multiple people, yet they do nearly nothing for the playoffs while I continue to put in the work from my log cabin here in Des Moines. Hell, those bozos don’t even do much work during the season, they’re essentially a “Sentinel Lite” for the first 4 weeks or so while they all “collect and discuss the data”. Remember when they’d at least give you the best female in the league rankings too? 

 

Either way, I’m sure their contracts are just like mine and run through the entire season (I have enough B’s Brother signed albums to last a lifetime as a bonus) so I’ve messaged them again and told them to send a committee member or two to help me with some predictions. Just remember, if their predictions aren’t the same as mine, they’re probably wrong. 

GF: Hello various committee members! (I never know how many of you I’m talking to, it’s pretty annoying that you’re shrouded in mystery and nobody knows who you are, who does that?). You know the drill by this time. Are you ready to do this? 

TSLQBPRC: “Sentinel Lite”???  We have put out an article for 96 consecutive weeks of football now.  No, it’s not the 745 or so that the Godfather has done, but we deserve better than “Sentinel Lite!”  And do you remember how pissed off people used to get about the Female Rankings?  We should bring them back just for that…

 

Oh, but to answer your question, yes, we’re ready to do this!

D1

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

#6 Freeballers 36, #3 Frodo Swaggins 22

#4 Sticky Bandits 32, #5 What A Dump 22

 

GF: What a week that saw the Freeballers get that first win, and it HAD to have felt good. They’ve worked hard all year and have come oh so close a few times, it was nice to see them get this feel good win before they get yeeted by the Legends. Oh, and Sticky won too, which is less fun and surprising. 

 

TSLQBPRC: We had this idea going into the first round that Frodo was a lock, and Sticky/What a Dump was more of a coin flip.  We were half right (What a Dump was close!) but we did NOT expect Freeballers to be ballin’ free on Championship Saturday.  Hats off to them.

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 LEGENDS (7-1) VS #6 FREEBALLERS (1-7)

 

PF: Legends 42.00 (1st) - FB 25.71 (6th)
PA: Legends 20.50 (1st)  - FB 38.86 (6th)

TSL Rank: Legends 3rd  - FB 50th

Past Games: Legends 41-16

Line: Legends (-17)

 

GF: The Freeballers come across as the feel good story after Playoff Saturday, but very rarely does Cinderella not turn back into a pumpkin a week later in D1. The Legends are focused on the championship, and this is historically when they turn it up a notch. There’s still a chip on Joey Batts’ shoulder from not getting to play in the title game last fall, and now that he doesn’t have a Stunts title chase this week as well for him to get injured in, expect him to knock this one out of the park. LEGENDS BY 24

 

TSLQBPRC: It was hard to imagine Freeballers getting past Frodo last week, and they did it.  Football is an unpredictable game at times, and anything can happen, in theory.  But no, Freeballers beating Legends is just about IMPOSSIBLE to imagine in the Spring of 2025.  LEGENDS BY 21

#2 EYES DOWNTOWN (7-1) VS #4 STICKY BANDITS (4-4)

 

PF: ED 36.63 (2nd) - SB 27.88 (4th)

PA: ED 26.50 (2nd) - SB 29.50 (3rd)

TSL Rank: ED 4th - SB 25th

Past Games: ED 31-23, ED 48-24

Line: Eyes Downtown (-7)

TSLQBPRC: Eyes Downtown have beaten the Sticky Bandits twice this season.  The Sticky Bandits have beaten Eyes Downtown in each of the past two seasons’ playoffs.  Which one is more likely to get in the head of the opposing team?  Our guess is we’ll see a close game, with the Sticky Bandits pulling off a last-drive miracle to set up a third consecutive Legends vs Sticky Bandits Finals.  STICKY BANDITS BY 1

GF: The Sticky Bandits come into this game looking a little more like themselves after last week’s victory over a very game What A Dump team. Even still, there hasn’t been something quite right with them this season, but I just can’t put my finger on what exactly. Eyes Downtown took a week off (although I’m sure they’ve been doing Bobby’s two a days in the sweltering heat leading up to this week) after earning the bye but rust shouldn’t be an issue for them whatsoever. They’ve been a well oiled machine all year and have somehow turned into fan favorite underdogs, which if you had time traveled back to the TSL in 2019 and told everyone that’s what would happen, you’d have been laughed out of the Rose Garden before Beth put an elbow into your ribs. The Legends vs Eyes Downtown rubber match needs to happen. EYES DOWNTOWN BY 3

THE D1 FINALS PREDICTIONS:

 

GF: Legends vs Eyes Downtown, just how we drew it up. I’m a little surprised that we got here, given the much talked about turnover on the ED roster, but life finds a way I guess. This is the best case scenario in terms of story lines and excitement and I’m here for it. The Legends won by 5 during the season, and the next week ED won by 2. The game will be close, and it will get chippy. But in the end, we’ll see a familiar sight: the Legends celebrating. LEGENDS BY 2

 

TSLQBPRC: The last SIX D1 finals have been Legends vs Eyes Downtown (three times) and Legends vs Sticky Bandits (three times).  And barring a Freeballers upset for the ages, we’re about to see one of these rematches yet again.  We picked the Bandits to win the semifinals, but do they have a real shot against Legends?  As good as anyone, maybe, but they’d be underdogs for sure.  There’s no one that’s watching how Legends have played this year that’s NOT taking Legends to win, it’s just a question of how much.  LEGENDS BY 10

 

D2

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

#5 Scared Hitless 26, #4 Jabronies 25

 

GF: One hell of a close game, as Scared Hitless proceeds to just do what they do best and show up in the playoffs, even if they got some help by Eric Kleckler’s untimely drops. 

TSLQBPRC: Jabronies are done for the season, but for their first in D2, they can’t be too disappointed.  They went 2-1 against Scared Hitless (unfortunately losing the only one that mattered, by just a point) and they did a heck of a lot better than Show Me Your TDs (okay, we’ll stop taking shots at that team now).  But Scared Hitless have a fearless playoff vibe, and they DO seem to play their best football this time of year.

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 CAN’T TOUCH THIS (7-1) VS #5 SCARED HITLESS (2-6)

 

PF: CTT 43.33 (2nd) - SH 30.86 (4th)

PA: CTT 19.67(1st) - SH 34.57 (4th)

TSL Rank: CTT 5th - SH 45th

Past Games: CTT 21-0 (Forfeit)

Line: Can’t Touch This (-10)

GF: Can’t Touch This went 7-0 in D2 play and were the class of the league for most of the season, putting up lots of points along the way. While everyone points to their strong armed, supermodel QB as the reason for their success (it doesn’t hurt, that’s for sure), it’s actually been their defense that’s the biggest reason for their success. I think Scared Hitless will come to play (they always do), but I don’t think they’ll be able to keep CTT’s offense in check for the entire game. CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 12

 

TSLQBPRC: Couldn’t have said it any better, Mr. Godfather.  Scared Hitless will not concede that they can’t beat the mighty Can’t Touch This, and we expect the first half to be a real battle.  But Can’t Touch This isn’t collapsing in the playoffs again.  CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 13

#2 MAVERICKS (5-3) VS #3 THE MALONES (4-4)

 

PF: Mavericks 37.38 (3rd) - Malones 43.86 (1st)

PA: Mavericks 30.88 (3rd) - Malones 27.43 (2nd)

TSL Rank: Mavericks 18th - Malones 24th

Past Games: Mavericks 41 - 40

Line: The Malones (-2)

 

TSLQBPRC: If you’ve seen the last two games between these teams, you know that Field 2 is where you want to be at 10 am on Saturday.  We’ve seen blown leads, comebacks, and dramatic finishes… which all seem to involve Stoner Dave celebrating with little to no time left on the clock.  The Malones have often LOOKED like the better team, and the Mavericks have been happy to play spoiler… so what do you bet on here?  The grit of Mavericks winning out again, or the talent of Malones to hold on this time?  This is a tough one.  With very little confidence, we’ll say THE MALONES BY 3

GF: The Malones have a better offense. The Malones have a better defense. The Malones look so much like the better team on paper that you forget that the Mavericks had the better record and are the higher seed. The only thing The Malones don’t have over the Mavericks? Wins. The Mavs won the D2 title last season over The Malones, and they beat The Malones this season in the “title game rematch” as well. The Malones also have this habit of choking in the biggest games. But they’re really good when they’re fired up (at the other team, not at each other), and they have to eventually overcome the Mavs, right? THE MALONES BY 2

THE D2 FINAL PREDICTION: 

 

GF: Can’t Touch This vs The Malones. These two teams gave us one of the best games of the year not too long ago, and I could only hope this one follows suit. Both teams are great on both sides of the ball, and this game will arguably come down to which team blinks first. I expect an all-out slug fest. Hopefully not literally. I’m flipping a coin. THE MALONES BY 1

 

TSLQBPRC: Can’t Touch This vs The Malones.  We agree on a Finals!  The Malones were SO much better than Can’t Touch This during last Fall’s finals.  And they haven’t gotten any WORSE at football… but it just feels like Can’t Touch This has gotten SO much better.  The Malones ARE the one team that can upset the undefeated (in D2 anyway) Can’t Touch This, but we just don’t think we’ll see that on Saturday.  CAN’T TOUCH THIS BY 11

D3

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

FIRST ROUND

 

#10 Girthquakes 33, #7 Buffalo Vice 18

#9 D-Generation X, Y, and Z 21, #8 716 0 (Forfeit)

 

SECOND ROUND

 

#1 Wanderers 50, #10 Girthquakes 23

#2 Practice Squad 37, #9 D-Generation X, Y, and Z 27

#3 Passing While Intoxicated 35, #6 Becca Gets Reccked 27

#5 Bullet Club 39, #4 Cunning Stunts 37

GF: The GQs pull off a nice win over Buffalo Vice before getting thrown into the fire that are the Wanderers. DXYZ got the win after 716 forfeited (weak) but couldn’t muster enough points to beat Playoff B and Practice Squad. PWI took a hard fought victory over BGR, where both teams beat each other up pretty badly, and Bullet Club finished off the day with a minor upset over the Cunning Stunts that came down to the last play of the game. All in all, exactly what you’d expect from D3, and I expect more of the same this weekend, where honestly, every single potential finals matchup is loaded with intrigue. Almost feels like we can’t lose here. 

 

TSLQBPRC: D3 has been, for YEARS now, the TSL’s best division.  And by “best division” we mean that the lower seeded teams have a REAL shot of beating the top seeded teams any given Saturday.  GirthQuakes, Buffalo Vice, D-Generation XY&Z, Becca Gets Reccked, CUNNING FREAKIN’ STUNTS… these were all VERY good teams, and they’re all eliminated already!  We’re not sure why D3 teams seem to come and go each season and the division stays so interesting and competitive, but we love it.  This should be the main event of the weekend.

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 WANDERERS (8-0) VS #5 BULLET CLUB (3-3-2)

 

PF: Wanderers 47.88 (1st) -  BC 32.35 (5th)

PA: Wanderers 27.00 (2nd) - BC 30.00 (3rd)

TSL Rank: Wanderers 2nd - BC 28th

Past Games: NONE

Line: Wanderers (-8)

 

TSLQBPRC: We’ve been picking Wanderers to win this division since the pre-season, and nothing we’ve seen so far this season is going to change our mind… but it’s a testament to how well Bullet Club played against the Stunts on Saturday that some of us on our committee are saying THIS is going to be the upset of the season.  It’s not impossible that Wanderers lose (they’ve lost as heavy favorites before… just ask the two teams on the other side of the D3 bracket) and why not have it be to a savvy team like Bullet Club?  That said, we have to follow the numbers, and the numbers say WANDERERS BY 9

GF: The Wanderers and Bullet Club have played many close games the last few seasons, and after not getting to play each other during the season (D3 had 10 teams, so each team had someone they didn’t play all year), it’s only fitting that these two meet for the first time this season with a trip to the title game on the line. However, the Wanderers have been rolling with Frank and Sal and Stoner and Al pretty easily all season where Bullet Club has had lots of injuries and having to tough out some wins. That could help them in a close game, but I’m entirely sure that it’s going to be that close. WANDERERS BY 12

#2 PRACTICE SQUAD (5-3) VS #3 PASSING WHILE INTOXICATED (5-3)

 

PF: PS 33.57 (4th) - PWI 42.88 (3rd)

PA: PS 26.86 (1st) - PWI 34.38 (5th)

TSL Rank: PS 14th - PWI 17th

Past Games: PS 46-30

Line: Practice Squad (-3)

 

GF: Buckle up. Playoff B vs Buddy Lee. TD Tori vs Renee. Those non-descript other guys on PWI vs those non-descript other guys (besides Kenny, who rocks, and John who will email me about how I said this when they win) on Practice Squad? This is a pretty even game, although the results of the first battle (a 16 point beat down that the Squad gave PWI) suggests that PS might have PWI’s number. Both teams can absolutely score, and I expect the over of 71.5 points to cash in, so it’s going to come down to defense. At the end of the day, I think Practice Squad has a much better chance of getting the stops against PWI than the other way around. PWI had a very good season, but I think this is just a very bad matchup for them. Of course if they won by 10 I wouldn’t be that shocked. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 8

 

TSLQBPRC: It’s a shame that this game is happening at 2 pm when the crowds will have died down a bit (ie everyone’s too drunk to wander over from the bar) because we expect this game is going to be a CLASSIC.  You nailed it - the QB matchups and the Female matchups are just top notch here.  We don’t put much stock in the early season game, as BOTH teams have big reputations of elevating their play when it matters most.  We’re going to take PWI BY 4

THE D3 FINALS PREDICTION

 

GF: #1 Wanderers vs #2 Practice Squad. It’s chalk, sure, but going chalk in D3 is more of a shocker than not, right? The Wanderers knocked the Squad off by 9 points a couple of weeks ago, and as everyone knows, it’s really hard to beat B twice in a season. Especially when you get Playoff B in that second matchup. The Wanderers have clicked on all cylinders this season, and they might be going to D2 regardless after the way they played this year. But, things are never this easy in D3. PRACTICE SQUAD BY 2 

 

TSLQBPRC:  #1 Wanderers vs #3 PWI.  Fast, mobile, smarter-than-you’d-expect-considering-how-drunk-they-often-seem QBs?  Sign us up.  PWI eliminated Wanderers last Fall in the semifinals, but we don’t think it’s happening again.  Sure, Buddy can match Frank shot-for-shot (on the field or at the bar), but PWI’s big advantage in the past was Touchdown Tori.  She’s STILL incredible, but the return of Emily Laudico this year has evened the playing field a bit for the female players in this matchup.  So if the QBs and the women are more or less equal, and we have to bet on the men… aren’t you taking the team with Sal and Stoner?  WANDERERS BY 8

D4

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

#2 Bird Watching In My Birkenstocks 44, #8 Cobblestone 37

#6 Come From Behind 38, #3 Mike’s Detailing 6

#4 Puckett 38, #5 Tater Tots 30

 

TSLQBPRC: The “Big Three” of D4 is down to a “Big Two” after Mike’s Detailing’s QB no-showed last weekend and they imploded without a proper backup.  And Bird Watching in My Birkenstocks almost choked it away too!  Interdimensional Lightning Falcons must have been planning their championship parade already (Andrew seems like a parade enthusiast to us).  Are Puckett and Come From Behind ready to shock the world and eliminate the favorites this weekend?

GF: Cobblestone pulling off that upset after a tumultuous season would’ve been the cherry on top of the “anything can happen on Playoff Saturday” sundae. BWB has to know they were lucky to escape. Come From Behind took Mike’s Detailing behind the woodshed (and not for the reasons Molly usually takes someone behind the woodshed either), taking advantage of a missing MD QB to move on to Championship Saturday. And oh look, Puckett is playing well in a playoff game. Who expected that? Oh yeah, everyone. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 INTERDIMENSIONAL LIGHTNING FALCONS (7-1) vs #6 COME FROM BEHIND (3-5)

 

PF: ILF 38.86 (2nd) - CFB 24.57 (6th)

PA: ILF 22.00 (2nd)) - CFB 32.86 (7th)

TSL Rank: ILF 6th - CFB 36th

Past Games: Come From Behind 34-33

Line: Interdimensional Lightning Falcons (-6)

 

GF: Is this finally the year for ILF?? It might be, but they’ve gotten quite the draw with CFB in their opening game. CFB had quite the rough patch during the season that dipped them to 3-5, but they really got it together last week, regardless of MD’s QB situation. They’ve already shown they can play with ILF (since you know, they beat them) and they’re very capable of doing it again. Besides, every Championship needs a shocker, doesn’t it? COME FROM BEHIND BY 2

 

TSLQBPRC: ILF are lucky that the schedule-makers put D4 before D3.  Five possible games in a day is hard for anyone, let alone a QB that scrambles as much as Buddy.  A fresh QB will make a big difference though, as Buddy has a LITTLE more mobility at this stage in his career than Paul LoVullo.  We know that CFB won their matchup earlier this season, and you can argue that means they “match up well” against ILF.  But the numbers all say that ILF are just a better team, and barring a weird collapse, it’s hard to imagine them falling in the semifinals.  ILF BY 15

#2 BIRD WATCHING IN MY BIRKENSTOCKS (6-2) VS #4 PUCKETT (5-3)

 

PF: BWB 40.75 (1st) - Puckett 31.00 (4th)

PA: BWB 21.88 (1st) - Puckett 31.50 (6th)

TSL Rank: BWB 10th - Puckett 16th

Past Games: BWB 40-12

Line: Bird Watching In My Birkenstocks (-6)

 

TSLQBPRC: Doesn’t Puckett ALWAYS morph into a different team for playoffs?  Isn’t that their “thing”?  They were a good team in the regular season, and we think we’ll see a GREAT version of them on Saturday… against a Bird Watching in My Birkenstocks team that suddenly looked beatable last weekend.  We’ll take the (small) upset here.  PUCKETT BY 2

GF: I think this is a pretty classic case of the numbers being deceiving. BWB has the best offense and defense in the division because they got the easy wins over Cobblestone which has made them look a bit more formidable than they really are. I wonder if Puckett was missing players in that 40-12 loss because it feels almost out of place based on the rest of their season. I think I’m going to go with the playoff bump Puckett always gets. PUCKETT BY 3

THE D4 FINALS PREDICTIONS

 

TSLQBPRC: #1 ILF vs #4 Puckett.  You can see from our predictions earlier that we do not expect Buddy to be a two-time champion on Saturday (unless he wins Breakfast Club, maybe).  But we DO expect him to walk away with ONE championship, and this is the one.  This is too good a team to fail this session… maybe they’re saving their failures for next session, when they move up to D3 and suddenly lose their star Quarterback?  ILF BY 9

GF: #4 Puckett vs #6 Come From Behind. Just like everyone else had, right? There’s always a “wacky” division championship that people weren’t expecting, and this feels like a plausible prediction to come true. What’s even better is that these two teams just played a couple of weeks ago in an awesome game (Puckett won 32-30) so if this ends up being the title game, we should see a good one. PUCKETT BY 6

D5

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 Powerpuff Girls 52, #9 Pit Harade 12

#2 Two Tuddies 43, #7 Mo’ Chicken 0

#3 Not So Sticky 21, #6 Jake From State Farm 20

#5 Blitzkrieg 35, #4 Sausage McMuffins 30

 

GF: No real surprises in D5 - The top two seeds dominated, Not So Sticky pulled out a close one, and Blitzkrieg and the McMuffins had a classic close contest. D5 definitely had a clear line between the haves and have nots this year. 

 

TSLQBPRC: The headline of D5 going into the playoffs was “No one can beat the PowerPuff Girls… although Two Tuddies will try” (remember?  From our article last week?  Or does everyone just read the Godfather?).  Nothing we saw last week has changed our perception of the division.  It’s still PowerPuff and Tuddies miles ahead of the rest of the crowd… and unfortunately for Tuddies, THEY are a mile behind the all-girls team.  

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 POWERPUFF GIRLS (8-0) VS #5 BLITZKRIEG (3-4-1)

 

PF: PPG 48.25 (1st) - BK 19.38 (6th)

PA: PPG 17.25 (1st) - BK 18.75 (2nd)

TSL Rank: PPG 1st - BK 29th

Past Games: PPG 28-18

Line: Powerpuff Girls (-14)

 

GF: The Powerpuff Girls continued their assault on D5, winning by 40 last week to make it to the 2nd round. Here they’ll meet up with D6 champion Blitzkrieg, who shouldn’t be considered a push over by the girls. The PPG scored 43+ and won by two scores or more in every single game this season EXCEPT against Blitzkrieg, where they only won by 10 points, 28-18. The BK Defense is very good, and they’re able to slow down the PPG offense. The question will be if the BK offense can put up enough points to pull this one out. Not sure they can. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 9

 

TSLQBPRC:  It IS interesting that Blitzkrieg lost to PowerPuff Girls by only 10 points this season.  Did they figure out the magic formula to keep up with PPG?  Or did they just have a lucky performance on a day that PowerPuff was feeling off?  We tend to think it’s the latter.  With respect to Blitzkrieg (who looked JUST FINE in D5 this session) there is no chance anyone wins this division other than the PowerPuff Girls.  Hey, what happened to their costume day this season?? POWERPUFF BY 21

#2 TWO TUDDIES (7-1) VS #3 NOT SO STICKY (5-3)

 

PF: TT 33.00 (2nd) - NSS 23.38 (5th)

PA: TT 21.13 (4th) - NSS 21.00 (3rd)

TSL Rank: TT 7th - NSS 19th

Past Games: TT 29-28

Line: Two Tuddies (-1)

 

TSLQBPRC: These two played a CLASSIC earlier this season, and they usually have very good games against each other.  Not So Sticky had a SLIGHTLY better defense this season, but not by enough to matter.  Two Tuddies had a MUCH better offense this season, and that gives them an edge in this matchup for sure.  We do suspect it’ll come down to the last five minutes or so, but Kory Reid will make some ridiculous play, or Tino will have a one-handed interception, or Shirtless Chris will distract everyone by taking off his shirt, and Tuddies will steal the game.  TWO TUDDIES BY 3

GF: In this week’s edition of “Of course these two play each other in the playoffs”, I give you the Tud Buds vs NSS. A friendly rivalry that’s churned out many memorable games, including the Tuddies 29-28 victory earlier this season. Now with a trip to the D5 title game on the line, the stakes have never been higher. The winner most likely gets to go to war with the PPGs, which isn’t the best victory prize. There’s no doubt this will be a close one, but I do think it’ll end in the Tuddies’ favor. Barely. TWO TUDDIES BY 1 (AGAIN)

THE D5 FINALS PREDICTIONS

 

GF: #1 Powerpuff Girls vs #2 Two Tuddies. The PPGs won 44-10 against the Tud Buds a couple of weeks ago, and they may have figured out some holes that they can exploit again this time around. I do think the Tuddies will keep this game closer than the first one, but since about Week 2, the Powerpuff Girls have just felt inevitable. POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 16

 

TSLQBPRC: Tuddies celebrate their victory over Not So Sticky for three minutes.  The vibe is strong, and enthusiasm is at an all-time high.  Then the Finals starts.  POWERPUFF GIRLS BY 21

D6

 

LAST WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 TMA 34, #9 Intentional Clowning 27

#2 Balls Deep 44, #8 Select 16

#3 Blue Ballers 34, #6 Dogg Pound 8

#4 Irish Giants 21, #5 Raw Milkers 15 (OT)

 

TSLQBPRC: Last week we said “We don’t think [Intentional Clowning will] beat TMA on Saturday… but we wouldn’t be shocked if the game came down to the wire.”  It did!  What a game.  And Irish Giants won the TSL’s only Overtime game so far this season, which was awesome for them.  Yeah, the Balls Deep and Blue Ballers games weren’t very close… but we think they’ll have a more competitive one this week!

 

GF: Ah D6, The only division to have all of the top seeds win. After seeing the Irish Giants stay hot and pull out the win against the Milkers, I feel like it’s safe to say we have the 4 best teams in D6 left playing. TMA squeaked by Clowning, while both Balls Deep and the Blue Ballers easily rolled to victories last week. 

THIS WEEK’S GAMES

 

#1 TMA (7-1) VS #4 IRISH GIANTS (4-4)

 

PF: TMA 31.25 (2nd) - IG 16.88 (9th)

PA: TMA 20.63 (2nd) - IG 24.50 (4th)

TSL Rank: TMA 8th - IG 27th

Past Games: Irish Giants 27-12

Line: TMA (-3)

 

GF: Well, this might have ended up poorly for TMA. The Irish Giants are the 1 behind the 1 in 7-1 for TMA’s record, as they beat TMA on the last week of the season to stop them from going 8-0. I guess TMA didn’t have their QB for that one, which obviously hurts a team (someone ask Mike’s Detailing about that) but the Giants have been playing very well for a bit now. However, with a trip to the championship on the line, and the entire team (I assume) going to be there, TMA’s loss to the Giants may have been a good thing, as they won’t sleep on them this time, nor will they look past them to the title game where they’ll play whoever survives BD-BB. TMA BY 3

 

TSLQBPRC: TMA will be the favorites in this game, without question.  But they CAN’T be that confident, right?  They lost to Irish Giants a couple weeks ago, they ALMOST lost to Intentional Clowning last week, and Irish Giants have suddenly found their mojo.  Do we dare pick the upset here?? No, it looks like we’re not that bold.  TMA BY 2

#2 BALLS DEEP (6-2) VS #3 BLUE BALLERS (6-2)

 

PF: BD 31.13 (3rd) - BB 38.88 (1st)

PA: BD 19.13 (1st) - BB 29.38 (8th)

TSL Rank: BD 9th - BB 11th

Past Games: BD 47-30

Line: Balls Deep (-7)

 

TSLQBPRC: Blue Ballers play an incredible brand of hurry-up offense that’s putting up almost 40 points per game.  Balls Deep have the strongest defense in the division.  Clearly, something’s got to give here.  Balls Deep won the head-to-head matchup in the regular season.  Balls Deep has the better point differential.  We should pick Balls Deep, right?  Right?? BLUE BALLERS BY 5

GF: The Blue Ballers have been very impressive this season, at least on offense, as they scored a full TD more on average than anyone else. Their problem is that they have no idea how to play defense, and that combo leading to many wins is unsustainable. They weren’t going to have any trouble slowing down the Dogg Pound offense last week, but Balls Deep is a different story. Balls Deep has been good all season, they won their playoff game easily, and they seem so locked in that unless the Blue Ballers went to a defense clinic during the week, they’re in trouble. BALLS DEEP BY 10

THE D6 FINALS PREDICTIONS

 

TSLQBPRC: #1 TMA vs #3 Blue Ballers.  Other than D5 (where we took the #1 seed vs the #2 seed) it looks like we took EVERY #1 seed to win their game, and every “underdog” to win in the other semifinal game.  What a bunch of cowards we are!  Picking all the small upsets, and none of the big ones.  But #1 seeds are #1 seeds for a reason, and they’ve earned some benefit of the doubt.  TMA is a legendary TSL franchise with a storied history.  Blue Ballers used to be Mighty Drunks/Purple Nurples and they’re on a mission to change their entire identity this session.  We believe in what they’re doing.  Long story short: We have no idea what’s going to give in this game.  But since we haven’t bet against a #1 seed yet, this seems like the time.  BLUE BALLERS BY 5

 

GF: #1 TMA vs #2 Balls Deep. These were the best two teams all season, and it showed. TMA pulled out a 32-22 win during the season that left a little bad blood between the teams, and it also had the TSL discussing a “distinct kicking motion” like we’re the NHL. Either way, this one is sure to be a classic, with both teams evenly matched. At that point you have to go to vibes, and while the TMA vibes are always the best in the league, they haven’t been on point the last two weeks, while Balls Deep has been. BALLS DEEP BY 2

FIVE QUESTIONS FOR CHAMPIONSHIP SATURDAY

 

 

• If you could only watch ONE game from the set matchups (in other words no title games) what game is it? 

 

 

GF: There’s a few good ones to choose from here, but if I could only watch ONE game from the ones we know about, I’d have to choose Mavericks vs The Malones. 

 

TSLQBPRC: You chose right, but if we have to choose ANOTHER game that’s sure to deliver, it’s Practice Squad vs PWI.  They’ll write stories about this game some day.

 

 

• What prediction did you absolutely get wrong?

 

 

GF: I won’t count my slightly off the wall D4 prediction, but I’m sure that I’ve got D3 wrong in some way, shape or form. Anything can happen there. 

 

TSLQBPRC: D6 we might have gotten EVERY GAME wrong, let alone the championship.  Good divisions are unpredictable divisions.  D3 and D6… thanks for making this a season to remember.

 

 

• Who’s winning Breakfast Club?

 

 

GF: Well, we have the top two teams in Breakfast Club facing off, with Carly’s team taking on Sydney’s team. Both teams were 5-1, handing each other their losses. The teams are pretty similar overall, but at the end of the day, Buddy has two other championships to worry about, and Garrett doesn’t have anything to do after 10:00, so he can put it all on the line a bit more. SYD ON MY FACE BY 8

 

TSLQBPRC: Do you think Buddy “worries” about stuff?  We just assumed he rolls out of bed in the morning, pounds a 40, and plays some ball.  And isn’t that what Breakfast Club is all about?  ReinCARnated BY 10

 

 

• Which player is going to have the most impact on his/her team’s championship run?

 

 

GF: I’ll give you an obvious answer, a kind of obvious answer, and the sort of surprise. The obvious one is Buddy Lee, and that goes for PWI AND ILF. Oh, and ReinCARnated. If the rumors of him playing with an injury are true, having him play potentially five games seems like the wrong move. The kind of obvious answer is Stoner Dave. He’s just a baller, and now he has dad strength on top of it all? He’s helped the Wanderers go to another level, and he’s already helped the Mavericks win a title before. There’s nothing that says he CAN’T do it again. Last but CERTAINLY not least? Paul LoVullo. I know he’s playing in his 133rd season, but he still throws the ball harder than 96% of TSL QBs, and if he’s on, Come From Behind ascends a couple of levels. 

 

TSLQBPRC: We’ll cheat and give you two.  Can’t Touch This couldn’t get past the Malones last Fall (in fact, they weren’t even close).  This session they’re dominant.  Is the difference Ben Stack?  If he has a great day on Saturday, Can’t Touch This won’t just win D2 – they’ll be ready to compete in D1.  And our other is Touchdown Tori.  Can we all acknowledge she’s a Top Ten girl already?? (You DEMANDED the Female Rankings!  We won’t rank them all this session, but Tori is TOP TEN for sure)

 

 

• Let’s look WAY too far ahead here - which team’s future are you most excited about?

 

 

GF: There’s a lot of teams with bright futures. I really think Mike’s Detailing is coming along as a future top team, provided that they have the QB playing. I want to see The Malones play in D1, just to see what happens. The Powerpuff Girls in D4 is going to be fun to watch, of course. But I’m curious about a lot of D6 teams - The Raw Milkers showed lots of promise this season. Balls Deep should be in D5 next season as they’ve finally seemed to get it together. The Blue Ballers seem to be heading in a really nice direction as well. There’s just a lot of younger, newer teams that are just starting to “figure it out” and I want to see how they’ll do next season. 

 

TSLQBPRC: SO many good answers to this question.  How will Can’t Touch This do in D1?  Will PowerPuff Girls become the new Stunts and dominate D4 for half a decade until they finally move up to D3?  Can TMA return to glory and compete in D5 after struggling there in the past?  But our biggest question right now is “what can Wanderers do as a top division team?”  Do you remember when Topper used to call D1 and D2 the “Competitive” divisions and D3-D6 were the “Recreational” divisions?  If that’s still true (and it kind of is) are the Wanderers ready to compete with the other Competitive teams?  Are we going to see them in D1 some day?

TEN FINAL THOUGHTS FOR CHAMPIONSHIP SATURDAY

 

 

• Remember, even if your team isn’t playing at all this weekend, come on down to the fields anyway so you can watch the games and hang out with your TSL family for one last Saturday before August. 

 

 

 

• Games of the Day:

 

ALL OF THEM. 

 

• As always, make sure your teams are at the fields TEN MINUTES EARLY, as we’re going to start games as ON TIME as possible as to avoid overlapping games for players that could case conflicts and/or if there’s games that go into OT, things like that. 

 

 

• Here’s your annual reminder that, yes, the Race for Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality is a BIG DEAL, but please, please, please don’t be a complete jerk to the refs who might miss a call or not see something that you think you saw. The refs are instructed to toss you right out of the game if you’re going to lose your mind, so think twice before you potentially cost your team. 

 

 

 

• The current weather report is as follows: 80 degrees, with some potential rain early on. But at least it’ll be warm rain?

 

 

 

• Sign up for the TSL’s annual wine tournament if you haven’t yet! Limited spots are available! 

 

 

 

• Just a casual reminder from our good friends at the Rose Garden that you’re not to bring outside alcohol to the fields! 

 

 

 

• Just a casual reminder to our good friends at the Rose Garden that people wouldn’t do that if you gave them a few more specials! I’ve been told the prices are a little steep. Come on now! 

 

 

 

• Quick ranking of the #1 seeds from least likely to blow it to most likely to blow it: Powerpuff Girls, Legends, Can’t Touch This, ILF, Wanderers, TMA. 

 

 

 

• To the future champions, please make sure you stick around for your team photo for the website! 

 

The Race For Social Co-Ed Touch Football Immortality is about to end! Everything you’ve done until this moment: The practices, the missed birthday parties, the muscle pulls, the High Noons, the Bs Brother hugs…everything has led you to this moment, to the edge of glory. Will you capture it? Or just let it slip? 

 

I’ll see you in the cut. 

 

-GF OUT