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- Written by Jeff Krol
- Category: TSL QB Power Rankings
- Published: 01 September 2023
- Created: 01 September 2023
- Hits: 907
Welcome back to the TSL Quarterback Power Rankings!
We've always told our readers the same thing: if you want to read good, interesting writing about the TSL, we highly recommend you just read the Godfather. It's always insightful, always interesting and relevant. No, he doesn't have a perfect take on every team and player (he lives in Iowa for God's sake, give him a break) but he gives us GREAT content every week, and if you're like us (TSL junkies that just consume whatever League content we can get every week) it's like feeding our crack addiction.
Don't get us wrong, we LOVE our own article. Analytics, charts, graphs, all that bullshit gets us jazzed up for Saturdays like you wouldn't believe. But it can be a struggle in the early weeks of the season when there's nothing statistically relevant to write about yet. Four of our teams haven't even played yet, others started their seasons with backup QBs, and we don't even know who the starting QBs ARE on some squads yet. We wanted to do a Top 15 this week, and realized we didn't have nearly enough info on teams to confidently publish those rankings yet. So here we are, with no cool graphics to show you and the same ten QBs you read about last week.
Sure, it's dull, but we promise you two things: 1) we're not going to fudge the Rankings with new and undeserving names just to "shake things up" 2) we will get more interesting throughout the season as we have more data available and more games to assess how good these quarterbacks really are.
That said, here are your Top Ten starting QBs in the TSL. You will recognize all of these names from last week:
#1 Mike Thomas - Sticky Bandits
Last Week: Beat Frodo Swaggins 37-28
The Sticky Bandits picked up where they left off last season (at least last regular season) with a win over Frodo Swaggins. The team was shorthanded enough that Mike was forced to play defense and start three girls on offense, but the result was the same. Can the Bandits keep up with Eyes Downtown and Legends and other teams that have improved this offseason? We don't expect they'll go 8-0 again, but we do expect they will still be in the Championship mix at the end of the season.
#2 Joey Batts - Legends / Cunning Stunts
Last Week: Beat PWI 52-12, beat Buffalo Vice 61-33 (Stunts)
Legends continue their long Championship celebration sabbatical, so Joey's only action this season has been for the Stunts, who are immediately massive favorites to win D4. This is primarily a QB article so we'll start by pointing out the 113 points Joey scored this week... but we ALSO want to point out that they allowed only 45 points in those same games, which is an incredible showing for a gender team. Must be fun to win doubleheaders by nearly 70 combined points.
#3 Bobby McConnell - Eyes Downtown
Last Week: Beat Losing Streak 47-33
Legends haven't even played yet, and the Sticky Bandits have only played one game against Frodo... but doesn't it already seem like Eyes Downtown are huge D1 favorites? Losing Streak has GREAT defensive players, and yet Bobby nearly dropped 50 against them. We also expect they'll get BETTER throughout the season too as Bobby adjusts to his new receivers' strengths and weaknesses. Eyes Downtown have fallen short in the last two D1 Championship games, but this could be their best chance in years.
#4 Jordan Lawson - Losing Streak / Mavericks
Last Week: Beat Frodo Swaggins 59-36, lost to Eyes Downtown 47-33 (Losing Streak), lost to Can't Touch This 45-38 (Mavericks)
Jordan is currently 2-0 against Frodo Swaggins this session and 0-4 against everyone else. That's not his fault of course (Mavericks are scoring boatloads of points, and both D1 losses were to Eyes Downtown) but it CAN'T be a lot of fun for someone so used to winning. Both teams still seem like they have enough talent to compete for Championships so we're not writing off either one of them yet. But it'll be on Jordan to keep spirits up throughout this "losing streak" (we use that joke once per session, relax).
#5 Jeremy Burr - Untouchaballs
Last Week: Did Not Play
No game for Untouchaballs this week. Burr rises one spot in the Rankings with a few losses by our next guy...
#6 Garrett Beesing - Frodo Swaggins / BAADies
Last Week: Lost to Losing Streak 59-36, lost to Sticky Bandits 37-28 (Frodo Swaggins), lost to Come From Behind 48-19 (BAADies)
Frodo and BAADies are a combined 2-6 with a -122 point differential. Not the start Garrett was hoping for, but it doesn't make him NOT a top quarterback in this League. With respect to the Godfather as the only REAL source of Championship odds, we would guess two weeks into the season that Frodo is maybe a 200-1 favorite to win D1 (they won't get many better chances to win than a short-handed Sticky Bandits this season) and BAADies maybe a 6-1 favorite to win D5 (they can do it, but they probably need all their top girls present).
#7 Ryan Dougherty - Can't Touch This
Last Week: Beat Mavericks 45-38, beat Practice Squad 19-6
How do you win one game 45-38 and then the other 19-6? Seems almost impossible you'd be so good offensively and so bad defensively one game, and then completely swap talents the next game. Whatever happened, Can't Touch This are 3-0 and in first place in D2 their first session after moving up a division. Ryan's arm is clearly no secret at this point, but word is getting out that his girls can really play also.
#8 Dylan Day - Scared Hitless
Last Week: Did Not Play
No game for Scared Hitless this week. Remember when they beat All We Do is Quinn for a championship in overtime???
#9 Frank Laudico - Wanderers
Last Week: Beat The Malones 43-33, beat Keller Whales 37-31
The Wanderers were one play away from beating Can't Touch This in the D3 Finals last Spring. Would they be matching CTT's success in D2 right now? Who knows. But they're undefeated in D3 right now after winning their first two games of the session, and they're probably heavy favorites to win it all... depending how good The Family turns out to be.
#10 Travis Cleavenger - Cle-Avengers Assemble
Last Week: Did Not Play
No game for Cle-Avengers Assemble this week. How many D2 titles has Travis won over the years? DILFs and No Punt Intended, is that all?
Fancy Statistics Section
Yeah, right. You're not getting any fancy statistics out of us until at LEAST Week Four, and even then we'll tell you the sample size is too small to be meaningful (yes, we're going to copy/paste this line next week too, so get used to it)
That's it for the TSL Power Rankings this week! As we said above, we don't currently have our own email address anymore, so if you have any thoughts about QB rankings, or you want to make sure we know who's throwing for your team, please feel free to contact our good friend This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
What's YOUR ranking?
